Narayan’s article about arranged marriage makes for interesting reading. For many westerners, it probably provides a rare insight into the positive aspects of arranged marriages which are considered the norm is some cultures. Narayan discusses the benefits of such processes and, in many ways, her arguments are convincing. However, as Narayan is much more independent than many Indian women in her position, the elements that she considers to be benefits are perhaps not so for the larger population of women subjected to arranged marriages.
In her article, Shoba Narayan discusses the benefits of an arranged marriage. One of the points that she seems to value most highly is that the individuals have been carefully selected for each other. For example, she explains how Indian families will choose partners for their children who are of a similar financial and educational background, but that are physically different or complimentary to each other. The theory is that the similarities in background will provide comfort and security for the couple, while the physical contrasts will inject variety and excitement into the relationship, and healthy children. Narayan believes this selection process to be a positive thing as, she says, it matches couples up in terms of long-term suitability, rather than simply sexual attraction alone.
However, it is arguable that individuals should be free to choose their own partners or, indeed, choose not to have a partner at all. Narayan is unusual in that she believes in divorce as an option; the majority of Indian women embarking on arranged marriages do not count divorce as an option for them. Therefore, although Narayan’s reasons for believing in arranged marriages are sound on some levels, it cannot be ignored that the situation is very different for a woman who is then condemned to remain in the marriage for the rest of her life.
Furthermore, Narayan insisted on having the ultimate say over men that her parents selected for her. In the article, she describes how she was not taken with the first man that they suggested she marry. Therefore, her parents found another man and, this time, she decided he was worth committing to, at least for a short time. Once again, many Indian women do not have the option of turning down a man that they do not wish to marry. In fact, many such women are married to their husbands just a few hours after meeting them for the first time, with no option of declining the offer. Therefore, Narayan’s supposed benefits of an arranged marriage are, once again, irrelevant to most women in her position.
Shona Narayan has written the article two years into her arranged marriage and, so far, she is happy with how the situation has worked out. Perhaps as a result of this, her views on arranged marriages are largely positive. She points out what she believes to be the benefits of the process. However, she is an independent, western thinking woman. She always knew that divorce was an option to her if the marriage didn’t work out and, besides, she partook in the selection of the man before agreeing to marrying him. As many Indian women are not given these choices, or any choices at all for that matter, Narayan’s views could be seen as irrelevant to them and to their situations.
