Cicero argued that true friendship cannot be attained without virtue on the part of the persons. He stressed the importance of virtue among people before they can be considered true friends. On the other hand, Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg comments that virtue is not a criterion for determining true friendship. Facebook, a social networking site where people become friends with thousands of others without ever seeing them, is devoid of this view by Cicero. This is because rarely does a person know the character and virtue of his friends in a social networking site but rather chooses friends based on shared interests. This essay seeks to explore the question as to what Cicero would say of facebook friends in this modern context. To this end, this essay shall draw heavily on Cicero’s work, Treatise on Friendship and commentary by Mark Zuckerberg relating to friendship. In conclusion, this essay shall express an opinion as to the two contrasting views taken by Cicero and Zuckerberg.
In the modern context where friendships are ruled by social networking sites such as facebook and titter, it is critical to examine the concept of true friendship. Research suggests that less than half of Americans know their friends at a personal level. Without doubt, Facebook and other similar social networking sites are changing the nature of human relationships. A research conducted by Pew Research Center indicated that only 43 percent of Americans did know their friends by name. The same study revealed even more shocking details that twenty nine percent of Americans know only some by name while another twenty eight percent do not know their friends by name. This raises the question as to how these Americans became friends with people they know not by name. It could only point to the social networking sites. Most of the Americans at the present boast of several friends and followers running into thousands on sites such as Facebook. However, in real life these Americans only have a small circle of friends. It is against this background that we examine the concept of true friendship as espoused by Cicero and then compare it against the modern trend which takes the view of Mark Zuckerberg.
In De Amicitia, which is a classical characterization of friendship also known as the Treatise on Friendship, Cicero argues that virtue is the foundation of true friendship. The Treatise is an act between two senior Roman characters where the main speaker named Laelius says that in the face of a true friend a man sees it as it were a second self. Laelius continues to state that were a man’s friends be rich, so must his friend be and that though he be weak, his friend’s strength is his. He further adds that in a friend’s life does a man enjoy a second life after his own is finished. This characterization of friendship by Cicero in this book as depicted through the statement of Laelius is of critical importance in the modern context. It is the case in this age of social networking sites, that people spend considerable periods of time on such sites rather than with their neighbors. There has been a decline in neighborliness and true friendship among people. Zuckerberg would seem to argue that true friendship is not necessarily dependent on good neighborliness and that the same can be achieved even without a personal relationship with another. It must be set out that Cicero does not confound this proposition. In fact, Cicero is actually cautious in regarding neighbors as true friends and seems to be of the view that neighbors do not necessarily make true friends.
With respect to this, Cicero opines that the Latin word of friendship derives from the Latin word for love and that love is usually the big mover of contracting mutual affection. He then states that friendship is a product of natural impulse rather than a wish for help. It is an inclination on the part of one’s heart which is combined with an instinct of love rather than a quest for material benefit or advantage. He then proffers that nothing conciliates love and affection like it does, virtue. He wonders why people feel attracted to others they may never have known upon learning of their honesty and virtue. He thus concludes that neighborliness is not a precursor to true friendship. To this extent, it would appear that the view of Zuckerberg on this point is in conformity with Cicero. It is clear to us that proximity between people is important only in so far as forging relationships is concerned, but not in the forming of true friendships. Indeed, in the Treatise on Friendship, Cicero states that nature has formed man in a way that a particular tie unites him with fellow man, though this tie is strengthened by proximity. In this respect, friendship must be distinguished from the relationship in the sense that there is a lesser bond of affection in the relationship which places a burden on another to help or share in the feelings of the other.
Cicero further argues that true love found in true friendships guided by virtue allows a friend to share in the burdens, thoughts, anxieties, joys and pleasures of another. He however cites virtue as a prerequisite of all these attributes and makes the case that a selfish person without virtue is unable to share in the joys of a friend. Turning to the commentary by Mark Zuckerberg, it occurs to us that the problem with friends on Facebook is not due to the absence of proximity as evident in this discourse. On the contrary, it is the lack of a shared pursuit of virtue that makes it impossible for man to attain true friendship. On this point, a divergence occurs between Cicero and Zuckerberg though they both agree that proximity is not a determinant of true friendship.
Zuckerberg avers that virtue among friends is not a criterion to determine true friendship. Cicero is of the view that without virtue, there can be no true friendship. He calls for the cultivation of not just acquaintances but more virtue if true friendship is to be achieved. In the Treatise on Friendship, he states that nature has given man friendship as the handmaiden of virtue and not a partner in guilt. As a consequence, he argues that the partnership requires moral rectitude, peace of mind and serenity. Man must devote himself to virtue for without it there cannot be any friendship or anything like it. He continues to state that without virtue, man will sooner rather than later find out that the friends he imagined he possesses were an illusion the moment the friendship is tested by say, a grave disaster falling on him. In contrast, Zuckerberg presses for the making of friends on Facebook in the fast manner which is characteristic of social networking sites and rubbishes the notion of virtue in formation of true friendships. Facebook enables one to form friends in a fast manner with others with whom one shares some interest or context. This is in direct contrast to Cicero who argued that people must wait to make up their minds about friendships till men’s characters and years have reached their full strength and development. He warned man against forging friendships with people whom they shared interests such as football or hunting together, saying that this alone without virtue is not sufficient to forge true friendships.
In conclusion, and after evaluating the views of both Cicero and Zuckerberg, I would buy Cicero’s view on true friendship for a number of reasons. Just as Cicero notes, we should be wary of making friends with people who are not of exemplary character and virtue. The making of friends on social networking sites as is currently the norm is deficient of virtue that was extolled by Cicero. An excerpt of Cicero’s book, Treatise in Friendship is illuminating in this context. He poses a rhetorical question and asks how life would be worth living when it lacks the repose that is to be found in mutual goodwill of a friend. He further adds that it would be of no delight if a man would not confide in his friend and be sure that the same friend will share in his thoughts or joys. More so, I do find that friends on Facebook are in most instances no more than a collection of property that avails only amusement but no true friendship. This is even manifest in the tendency by man to amass several friends in the social networking sites. This position is not new as Cicero notes in his reminisce of the words of a dead friend named Scipio. He states that Scipio used to complain that men could tell of how many sheep and goats they possessed yet, they could not do the same for friends. He added that Scipio would say that men took more time and trouble in finding sheep and goats than they would, true friends. Men also had no marks or standards of judging the suitability of such people becoming their friends.
Works Cited
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