How do parents discipline their children in public places and how do they keep their children from misbehaving through violent means
This essay aims to look at the different techniques used by parents to discipline their children. The multiple reasons that are used and the number of situations that are examined to look into the different techniques are explored too. Why parents attempt to use harsh means to change behavior is discussed in detail.
Observe how parents discipline their children in a public place. How frequently do parents use physical punishment to discipline their children? In what situations?! Try to observe in different locations and see whether the setting, situation, and social class of the parents influence their public behavior.
Domestic violence is largely common in the world. While progress has brought changes far and wide, violence is still existent in numerous parts of the world. Domestic violence should not take place. It is a fact that needs not any reason. However, sadly it still plagues the world. What is the definition of domestic violence? When the violence seemed to reach its peak, the state of Michigan had changed the laws for violence. In the year 2000, they introduced different further laws so that abusers could immediately ask for help when the battering crossed its limit .
Domestic behavior is remarked as the pattern of behavior in a relationship which causes a person to exercise influence over the intimate partner. Abuse can be characterized as physical, sexual, emotional and psychological. However, violence could be observed among the parents on their kids. In some cases, parents tend to misuse their children. They punish them harshly in order to discipline them. Nevertheless, it is necessary to understand whether it is worthwhile to consider this option to make your children understand how to behave in a public place. The more you slap a child and disgrace him in public, the more problems you are creating which would soon show up in your child’s personality building.
Bandura Ross studied on aggression in children which is learnt through modeling and reinforcement. This was done when a child copied the Bobo doll and imitated the behavior. This theory is applicable in real life situations too. When parents attempt to scold their kid in a gathering, they are inculcating a wrong pattern in their child’s mind. They are teaching him that it is absolutely alright if you want to scold someone by showing your anger to them. These children do the same with their kids and kill their self-esteem.
Statistics have revealed that domestic violence affects nearly 3 million children between the ages of 3 and 17 annually. These children who tend to become exposed to this violence are affected physically, mentally and developmentally. The psychologists Campbell and Lewandowski have proposed that domestic violence would actually be extremely severe if the mother has been subject to abuse at the time of her pregnancy. Moreover, when a mother is aware of the severe experiences her child has to undergo, then she would most probably stay in a relationship to protect her child from the abuse he or she is exposed to (Dominique and Simons, 2010).
There are parents who would go as far as beating their children in public to alter their habits. There are also the considerate ones who would be polite and explain the cause of a bad behavior and why it should be avoided when the situation where it occurred is no more. When the children are punished, they lose their self-esteem. Their confidence dies. When they are tortured continuously and given brutal punishments for their slightly ill behavior, they end up frustrated, frightened to the extent that they are unable to take proper meals and inability to sleep at all. As a result, these children lose weight and their social circle declines too. They become aloof fearing they would have to undergo the same embarrassment again and would find no acceptance in the society at all. They are not left with any choices but to cut off from their friends and alienate themselves from their families. In families where the male dominates the female and batters and abuses her, it is likely that children would experience the same environment too.
How this disciplinary tool of violence further affects the development of the child has also been confirmed via a research which looked into the intergenerational violence cycle. The study had a total of 102 families and questionnaires were used to gain insight into the parents’ beliefs about the use of corporal punishment to deal with their kids. The findings revealed that parents had experienced corporal punishment in their childhood considered a normal way to discipline their child. They continued with spanking their kids if they would not agree to certain behaviors and these children carried with this damaging attitude in their parenthood.
A very important observation that needs mention when considering how parents discipline their children in public place is the use of domestic violence. This is relevant to the differences in social standards of the families. The social differences were a major factor in choosing the restrictive v/s autonomy granting technique. In the recent studies, however, the social stratification is not much of a problem but the perception of the children’s misbehaving act as that of an emergency situation is the decisive factor when it comes to the parents’ choice of considering the disciplinary techniques. The studies that pointed out on social class differences explained several reasons why people were different.Duvall’s (1946) study findings indicated that parents who belong to the working-class would place more emphasis on the traditional learning rather than the middle class ones whose emphases was largely on development of the child. To further elaborate the study, working class parents aimed to impart traditional values expecting their children to conform more to the expectations of the society while the middle class parents tried to shape their child’s behavior to enable him to gain control of his or her own actions.
Kohn (1963) explained why these social differences caused the parents to react differently towards their children’s misbehavior. This occurs generally when parents from different social backgrounds have come to look at the world in different ways learning how to succumb to various situations and having accordingly framed beliefs. This is how they started judging people and then framed beliefs according to which they devise their own patterns for disciplining their child.
In conclusion, the way parents have developed over the years and experienced their childhood is largely a defining factor in how they would discipline their child. Social class differences with poor families being met with pressure are expected to be harsh or even ignorant towards children. Alongside this, the situation if it calls for an emergency would also decide what disciplinary action parents would select.
References
Hornor, G. (2005). Domestic Vioelnce and Childern. Jpedhc. 19(3). Available at http://theacademy.sdsu.edu/resources/research-countydata%20docs/DV.pdf as accessed on 2/8/2012
Brown, B. W. (2000). Parents' Discipline of Children in Public Places. Natioanl Council On Family Relations 28(1). p.67-71
Campos, R. (2009). The Perils Of Disciplining In Public, Parent dish. Available at http://www.parentdish.com/2009/08/26/the-perils-of-disciplining-in-public/ accessed 2/8/2012
Dominique A. Simons, S. K. (2010, September 2). About Us: Sciencedirect. Available at http://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0145213410001754 as accessed on 1/8/2012
