Getting wedded devoid of proper pre-marital training can be likened to beginning a business venture that without preparing. Most of the marriages contracted without the necessary preparations both physically and psychologically end with falling apart (Cherlin, 1992). While engaged, most couples consider themselves happy and they presume that they enjoy perfect relationships therefore do not prepare with regard to dealing with misunderstandings which may arise later when they are married (Martin, 2004). Consequently, a considerable number of couples believe that living together extensively before marrying would train them for marital life (Larry, 2000). As such, most people tend to depend on their fate and passionate connection to ensure a successful marriage.
It is however good for couples to appreciate that premarital trainings which are mostly skill-based help in ensuring that a marriage starts on a resolute foundation. Further, a proper preparation also helps in reduction of tension and stress usually experienced before marriage (Ginsborg, 2003). Basically, the preparation efforts classes are anchored in reality. Realism is an essential tenet which facilitates the strengthening of a relationship (Therborn, 2004). Most importantly, it acts as a guide for the couples in dealing with potential disagreements and challenges which every couple encounters at some stage during their matrimony.
Further, marriage is a typically complex issue in the sense that it requires much commitment and encompasses many management related challenges (Cherlin, 2004). As such, married people usually find themselves at a dilemma of managing two careers especially when taking care of children. Such challenges require that married persons have a well established capacity with regard to communicating, resolving concerns, as well as maintaining their mutuality level as regards set objectives. Without the benefit of proper premarital preparations, it would be easy to feel besieged by anxiety as a result of the physical and more so psychological demands.
With regard to the foregoing, there is no denying that success in marriages will be determined by factors such as compatibility, communication expectations, intimacy and sexuality, personality, and determination of continuing goals (Casper, 2002). The fore mentioned can be intensively and comprehensively covered in premarital preparation and planning. This is usually achieved through guidance and counseling (Carlson, 2004).
Work Cited
Bumpass, L. and Hsien-Hen Lu, “Trends in Cohabitation and Implications for Children's
Family Contexts in the United States,” Population Studies 54, 2000.
Casper, L. and Bianchi, M. Continuity and Change in the American Family. Thousand Oaks,
Calif: Sage, 2002.
Cherlin, J. Marriage, Divorce, Remarriage. Cambridge, MA: Harvard UniversityPress, 1992,
84-86.
Carlson, M., McLanahan, S. and England, P. “Union Formation in Fragile Families,”
Demography 41, 2004, 237–61.
Casper, L. and Bianchi, M. Continuity and Change in the American Family. Thousand Oaks,
Calif.: Sage, 2002.
Cherlin, J. “The Deinstitutionalization of American Marriage,” Journal of Marriage and the
Family 66, 2004, 848–61.
Ginsborg, P. “The Family Politics of the Great Dictators,” in Family Life in the Twentieth
Century. Yale University Press, 2003, 188–97.
Martin, P. “Growing Evidence for a ‘Divorce Divide'? Education and Marital Dissolution
Rates in the U.S. since the 1970s,” Working Paper on Social Dimensions of Inequality. New York: Russell Sage Foundation, 2004.
Therborn, G. Between Sex and Power: Family in the World, 1900–2000. London: Routledge,
2004.