Abstract
Parents have always wished to control the behavior of their children without having to upset these young ones. This paper examines employing the reverse psychology technique as a best technique in controlling behavior in children. Children also have their desires, which they would wish to carry. Contrary to the expectations of the children, parents would at times use techniques to prevent them from executing the things they desire most. The paper examines the behavior of a three-year-old kid, who neither accepts the provided meal nor wishes to take his routine nighttime shower. However, after using the reverse psychology on this child, he agrees to the ideas that he had previously objected. The most interesting thing is the fact that the child consents to these previous ideas without noticing influence or manipulation. The paper also highlights the limitations related to conducting such experiments, both on adults of conscious minds and children
Introduction and literature review.
Reverse psychology refers to a technique that involves the advocacy of a behavior or belief, which is opposite to the desired one (Hatch &Taylor 2009). In this technique, it is expected that encourages the subject of the persuasion in doing the actual desired behavior or belief, which is usually the opposite of the suggested idea. This psychological technique lies on the reactance phenomenon where people have negative emotional reaction to persuasion and often choosing the option that is advocated against (Hatch &Taylor 2009). In other words, this technique refers to influencing another person in doing something by telling them the opposite of what you would wish to be done.
Despite being considered as an effective child rearing method, some researchers have established that it could be harmful to the child if it used to often or incorrectly. These psychologists have revealed that if implemented at best, this technique would be useless; however, if used at worst, it could damage the self-esteem of the child, or worse still, cause guilt feeling on the child.
These psychologists have made further suggestions on the best ways to use reverse psychology on children. In their view, it is inappropriate to use this as a first choice technique; however, it should be used sparingly on the child especially in cases where all other techniques have proved to be ineffective. Secondly, in their proposals, using this technique in a positive form, rather than a negative form would achieve better results. A positive approach involves instructing the child on what she should do rather what she should not do. The other was of effectively using this technique is by offering the child a choice. This would assists in making the child feel independent since she would be choosing from the provided options, for instance, if she refuses to sleep, you could tell the child that if she feels sleep time is over, then she should take bath.
These psychologists have also found it appropriate to challenge the child as opposed to issuing orders. They have also suggested that a positive reward system, which does not trigger competition between siblings, would also be appropriate. Finally, they advice the parents that in the event of a child’s misbehavior or stubbornness, it would be appropriate to stay calm and evade showing emotional reactions.
Method and procedure
In this section of the research, I will conduct an experiment to test the hypothesis that has been discussed in the introduction section of the report. For the purpose of this research, the independent variables that I will examine are anxiety and acceptance.
The experiment that I carried out involves administering reverse psychology on a three-year-old boy, in order to test the success of this technique. We live with the in the same house and I have the responsibility of overseeing that the kid has completed all the evening requirements after I come from school. School is usually exhaustive from the assignments, having to attend the lectures to catching of with the deadlines. After a tiresome day, I reach home and manage to prepare a very nutritious food for the kid. Against my expectations, the kid rejects the meal and request for burgers that his parents have always tried to get rid of from his menu. This is very depressive and unexpected; however, I try to give the child another option. I tell him that since he has refused to take the delicious meal that I had prepared for him and would not wish to have any other meal apart from the one he is requesting, he could have the apple juice that he usually likes and take nighttime shower. Somehow, the child responds by accepting to take the drink and ignores the latter, which is the nighttime shower.
After this annoying encounter with the kid, I am sure that bullying the child into taking my orders would not yield any results, but would spoil the relationship between him and me. Therefore, I am left with limited options, the best of them being to employ the reverse psychology technique on the child. Usually, the child would not spend the night comfortably without taking his supper. Despite taking the drink, I am sure he would be problematic in the night and would request something to eat in the middle of the night. Nevertheless, I would not wish to be disturbed in my sleep since I would be having a busy schedule at school the following morning.
I served the meal that the child had declined to take and start to eat while he is seated next to me watching television. After realizing that the child is anxiously staring at me, I ask him if he would wish to have some, which he accepts to try a little. I served the child sufficient quantities of the meal and told the child; “I bet you can’t finish your food in 20 minutes, and after I finish before you, I am going to take shower and go to bed before you”. To this statement, the child promises that he can finish before me and even take shower before me. After implementing this technique, I am relieved that the child has finally given in to my request and would do the desired thing.
The independent variables are acceptance, which encompasses the acceptable behavior that I accept of the child, and anxiety, which represents the child’s wish to do the things that best suits him. The child needs a junky food, which is not accepted by the parents.
Data Analyses & Expected Results
The above is a 2x2 cell that show the independent variables before and after the experiment. From the above cell, it can be established that before the employment of the technique on the kid, his action were unacceptable both by the parents and myself. They expect him to take his supper and nighttime shower willfully before retiring to bed. However, the child’s anxiety is the reverse of what is expected of him. Nevertheless, after the experiment, the child responds positively and becomes acceptable. However, in relation to anxiety, the child only changes the anxiety to the desired activity, but it still it remains high.
In the above figure, factor B represents anxiety while factor A represents acceptance. If the child responds to the technique, the two independent variables would effectively interact providing increased acceptance with increased anxiety. However, if the child fails to respond to technique, as in the first case when he could neither eat his food nor take the nighttime shower, the variables would not interact positively.
Discussion
Inferences
As earlier discussed, reverse psychology is considered appropriate only on children, whose conscience can easily be manipulated. However, if tried on mature persons, it could achieve its desired objectives, but the risk involved with the specimen realizing they were manipulated are severe. They would never trust the person who used this technique on them anymore.
When used on children, this technique is considered appropriate since parents can control the behavior and activities of the children that they do not desire to those that they would wish to be done. From the above experiment, the technique reveals the effectiveness of controlling child behavior. Children would always wish to do things their own way and using force to deter them from their desires may be dangerous to their development, therefore, the reverse psychology technique is considered appropriate since the children never notice they have been influenced to do the things they initially opposed.
Limitations
The major limitation in conducting this experiment is coping with the child’s behavior. For instance, in this case, after a whacking day, and struggling to prepare the child’s meal, he rejects it outright without having to consider the stress that I have gone through in the day. In usual cases, a person would opt for forcing this child to eat the provided food, and forcefully take the nighttime shower. Worse still, the child could be left to sleep without eating or taking the nighttime shower. In both cases, the child would have been handled harshly, which would affect his development and relation to the person using the technique on him. In this respect, understanding the child and remaining calm, even when he proves stubborn, especially after a busy day proves difficult.
The other limitation for this technique is time. In order to implement this technique on your child successfully, you have to allow sufficient time for the child to respond to the technique. Rushing the child could translate to him that you could be employing authoritarian technique and he would eventually not give the desired results. In case the time is not available, this technique would be inappropriate. The time that is allocated for this exercise could also be used for other activities.
Importance of the research
The research experiment conducted herein is useful in finding out the best strategy practices that can be implemented on the child for good parenting. Any parent, who is conscious of good parenting would always want to maintain the mutual relationships they have with their children, especially when they are still young. Therefore, these parents would always look for the best practice they could employ to control their children’s behavior, while still maintaining the relationship between them.
References:
Hatch S., &Taylor J., (2009), Rigorous Magic: Communication Ideas and their Application. Hoboken, New Jersey: John Wiley & Sons.
