Free An Event That Changed Me Completely Essay Sample

I am a person who believes people easily. When I trust people, it comes from the core of my
heart, no doubts, no suspicion, just a blind faith. And I guess that is what cost me huge. I have a friend; I would say a best friend. We have been together since childhood, same school, and same college. One can say we are inseparable. Our friendship used to be an example for others. For me he was my soul mate, we are of same sex, still I will call him that because I do believe we had a connection in the past. The bond we share is beyond words. He had always been there during my tough times, be it personal or financial. I don’t think anyone can understand me more than he does. But then as they say, too much of everything is bad. May be our friendship went through that “too much”. He betrayed me! Not once, but many a times, I knew he was doing that, but I could not believe myself. I kept on denying it to myself. I said to myself repeatedly that maybe there is some misunderstanding on my part, maybe I was seeing the wrong side of the coin. But no, I was wrong. Finally, I realised that. But I guess it was too late.
We used to study together, we used to discuss what all we were about to study. During exam times we used to discuss the curriculum and decide upon what all to study. And I always believed him. Somewhere I was too dependent on him. I used to think he can never be wrong; whatever he says is the utmost truth, unquestionable, without \a doubt. May be I considered him lucky for me. I won’t say he was an evil person; no, he never was. At least I don’t think so. I noticed in a school term exam that he studied more than he actually told me. That time I just completely ignored it. I was warned by my mother not to trust him that blindly; after all it is about a rat race, everyone wants to win. So does him. But I didn’t listen to her. I argued, I fought with my mother just to defend him. It was the final semester. It was indeed a difficult one to crack. Everyone was really panicky. I am a person who gets too nervous before exams, that is when my best friend comes to my rescue. He again helped me in deciding what all we will be studying for that semester, I again trusted him, although I asked him again and again if he was studying anything extra, he kept on denying. Then the unexpected happened. I failed. It was a shock. This was the first time in my educational years that I failed in a subject. I was shattered. It took me quite a long time to bring myself to normal. I cursed myself; I felt like I have embarrassed my parents, I felt like dying! I took out the old question papers, I just wanted to see where I went wrong. And yes, I got it! It was my entire fault. I trusted him, yes; I was a fool that I did so. The questions I did wrong were the same that we discussed that we won’t do. And everything that happened that day just came in front of my eyes. I remember I was depressed after the exam as I knew that I did not appear well. I thought he also would not have been able to do those. But to a surprise he could! I didn’t take that to my heart and now when everything is clear in front of me, I am completely broken. The pain of failing was lesser than the pain of being betrayed. I couldn’t believe he did this to me. He was my best friend.
After that incident everything changed. I don’t trust anyone now. At least not that easily. I am not blind anymore. I believe if anyone is doing something for me now, then there must be some motive of his behind that deed. No one is too good to help others selflessly. I kind of don’t trust anybody. May be I won’t ever believe anyone now. I won’t ever depend on anyone till that extent. Those few days after the result I was not myself, depressed, lonely, tensed. I locked myself in a room for three days. Did not pick any call, did not meet anyone. I was just trying to recollect my broken pieces. I felt as if I was killed, as if I am dead now. More than the result I was hurt, because I lost my best friend.
He still is a friend of mine. I forgave him. But I won’t call him my best friend anymore. The equation has changed. We talk, but it’s more of a classmate type conversation, not the one that best friends have. I won’t say it totally had a negative impact. It rather changed me into a stronger and a more confident person. I reappeared for the supplementary exam; I cleared it on my own without his help. Now I am more self reliant, more self dependent.