First Grade
My cropped hair was too short for them to pull so they decided to make fun of my eyes instead. With eyeglasses since I was five, I had to wear them to school even during playtime. The other boys played rough, so I had to do my best to avoid rough-housing with them. But being the new student and looking much different than the rest, I was an easy target. “Chinky eyes”, “small eyes”, and “yellow skin” were my first few names in school as they referred to my eyes and skin. They always chased me around in school especially during recess and break time. It seemed like they found happiness in torturing me and seeing me cowering in fear.
And then it happened. I could not take all the pushing and tormenting anymore. The moment Andy touched my eyeglasses, I felt a strong surge of energy in my right fist and smacked him on his face. He fell to the ground and at that moment, I felt like a huge victor. I was no longer the pathetic and weak Chinese kid in an American school. I was the winner, the conqueror, and the defeater all rolled into one.
Second Grade
Miss Candace Danby is the beautiful teacher of the second grade class. Almost everyone had a crush on her, even those from different grade levels.
“Thank you very much,” she said.
“You’re welcome, Miss. I will give you more when Mama bakes another batch of brownies,” I replied. I was the happiest kid on earth! My heart was floating in the clouds.
Third Grade
Drawing was one of my favorite past times, thus, while waiting for our teachers to arrive, I would usually draw in my sketch pad, which contained various depictions of stick men and women, sceneries, and cartoon characters. Joseph grabbed my sketch pad and without my knowledge, drew a horrific rendition two lovers making out in a garden.
As giggles could slowly be heard in the classroom, little did I know that the cause was the sketchbook drawing created by Joseph. Mr. Greene confiscated the sketchbook and with that, I experienced the first “face the wall” episode of my life.
It was the longest 30 minutes of my life. Sometimes, it feels like I am still facing that Grade Three wall.
Fourth Grade
“You would make a fine doctor someday,” Mr. Gerson told me when I saw him at the school yard one day.
“I don’t want to become one. What makes you think I can be a future doctor?” I asked him.
“Chinese people are known for the various medicinal concoctions they make. Maybe you can invent one that could transform the world!” Such a wild thought, but all together an interesting one.
I don’t want to be a doctor. I can be a doctor. I want to be a doctor. Yeah, I can be one.
Fifth Grade
For the first time in my life, I got to play the all-American sport baseball in school. It felt so good to hit my first ball. I lifted the bat upwards and swung it across my chest as the ball got nearer. With the right arm angle, yay! I hit the ball. It rolled only a meter away from where I was but I hit it! I ran to first base as fast as I could. And for the first time, I felt I really saved myself. The science behind the sport, the geometrical angles that helped in hitting the ball, they were all perfect.
Sixth Grade
Cheng was the new Chinese kid in school. Just like how I was in First Grade, all eyes were on him. But he never got bullied like me. Immediately, he showed how good he was in Science and Math, which made him an instant success in the campus. He was big on accomplishing things on his own. He was always driven to success. Despite his achievements, he remained a down to earth, low-key, and friendly. From him I learned to strive harder and value triumphs.
No wonder. The name Cheng in Chinese means accomplishment, success, and sincerity.
Seventh Grade
My first kiss. It is a very memorable one because it was with a girl whom I have had a crush on since the Fourth Grade. Melissa is so different from people in our neighborhood. She had bright, green eyes and auburn hair. Her skin was creamy white. She walked with a lilt and talked with the most melodious voice I have ever heard. As I kissed her that day, I was saying goodbye to women from my race, my ancestry, my culture. I was saying hello to a world that has been my home for the last nine years and opening up myself to the world. It was the sweetest kiss shared by two individuals who genuinely cared for each other.
That day, I felt I was one with the world.
Eighth Grade
During each basketball game, cheerleaders would romp in their tiny, sexy outfits and smiled their brightest smiles as guys admired their tiny waistlines. But days before a game, I could hear them vomiting their lunch food as I pass by the girls’ rest room. They are living faces of people with eating disorders, of those people who are always afraid to gain weight even when they are underweight.
Sebastian, our neighbor, sits at night by the Chinese restaurant as he waits for Mr. Li to give him some food to eat in exchange for washing the dishes. This was his nightly routine just to be able to feed himself.
One side eats but throws up, the other side waits for leftovers, both needing food but for different reasons.
Ninth Grade
While playing a game of soccer with the boys at the park, I suddenly stopped chasing after the ball and felt dizzy – that was the last memory I remember. I woke up in the emergency room where various intravenous lines were attached to me. I suffered from extreme dehydration and was found to have symptoms of anemia, which explained tiny bruises that suddenly appeared on my body.
A nurse asked one of my friends what I have been eating and drinking because most Asians she encounters share the same symptoms. She says we all look pale in the eyes and lips.
Just because we came from the same continent we already have the same illnesses.
Tenth Grade
Despite having friends and classmates figuring in car accidents, Dad still taught me how to drive a car and when I was ready, had me take my driver’s license test, which I passed after 2 takes. On the day I finally got my license, a friend in school stole his mom’s car and went on a long-drive with his friends. Unfortunately, they got caught by the State troopers for over speeding and later on found out to be driving while intoxicated.
Dad only said, “Always be responsible for all your actions.” Since then, I made sure to think about the pros and cons of everything I do before I make my final decision. Best advice ever.
Eleventh Grade
History has always been one of my best subjects, including Literature, Mathematics, and Science. In History, we were given a research assignment about massacres that occurred in the past and discuss what transpired during those times.
In the library, I excitedly browsed various History books as I attempted to choose the best one among the subjects. And then, bam! The Chinese massacre in 1871 in LA spread out in front of me. This racially induced massacre brought chills to my spine.
Should I still be scared for myself and my family?
Twelfth Grade
Fast forward to graduation, I walk the aisle with my fellow graduates as we move forward to a very uncertain but exciting future. Cheng graduates at the top of our class and deservingly so. I go up the stage as I receive my awards as well. I may not have been the class valedictorian or salutatorian, but I belonged to the top 10 of the graduating class. This is definitely not a bad spot for a Chinese living in America. My parents have always instilled the value of education. I am proud to say that I have given them pride and happiness in seeing me graduate in high school.
