The paper takes off a good start discussing the research topic, but becomes incomplete and unclear in its introduction as it consistently explains the problem but fails to provide a clear and straightforward problem statement. A problem statement should include one sentence outlining how, why and what problem the study seeks to explore. This sentence shall act as a guide to the reader on what importance the paper holds, what data it shall examine and how it shall report the results based on the stated hypothesis. Besides to ensure the flow of ideas and to make the paper organized, the paper should portray uniformity that is paragraphs should have at least 80 and a maximum of 150 words for consistency.
On the other hand, the paragraphs should be connected in a way that the reader can connect the last sentence to the new sentence of the new paragraph. Also, the paper may consider taking up the use of subheadings to guide the reader to effectively understanding the flow of the study practices. Being a research study, using headings may come in handy as one shall be able to differentiate the introduction section, data collection, results, findings and conclusions. The paper also portrays multiple grammatical errors for example; the paper mixes the passive and present tense verbs which should consider a revision.
Also in the last paragraph, the sentence "Mental health disorders can be complicated to treat because so many different aspects play a role in them” is an incomplete comparison that needs restructuring. Punctuation should also be checked to ensure using Caps at the beginning of each sentence to avoid misappropriation and wrong sentence structure. Lastly, the paper is not correctly formatted in APA sixth edition as the paper cites the in-text as (Boden 2014) instead of a comma is essential for APA. All borrowed literature should be referenced to avoid plagiarism at least two in-text citations per paragraph. The cover page needs a changeup and all APA format requirements such as the Running head, and reference page list needs to be incorporated to make the paper standard.
References
Bolden. (2016). PSTD. New York: Routledge.
Braveman, P. (2006). Health disparities and health equity: Concepts and measurement. Michigan: Grapeville Press.
