The article raises the issues involved in intercultural marriages as they have increased in the United States. Since research in issues encountered in intercultural marriages is little, Frame (219) provides some assumptions on issues encountered in intercultural marriages. Firstly, intercultural marriages are stressful. Secondly, intercultural marriages tend to be more dysfunctional than monocultural marriages. In the article, Frame tries to establish ways that can be used to help intercultural couples cope with these issues.
Marital issues emanate from cultural backgrounds. Frame (221), notes that couples from different cultural backgrounds will have different value systems. The approach to life by one person is different from the other. Frame (221) provides an example of this through Amir (Middle Eastern) and Kathryn (American). Amir places more value on family and cooperation whereas Kathryn is goal oriented in terms of hard work and individual effort. This introduces differences in the sense that one spouse values time spent with family while the other is more about being busy and working.
According to Frame (222), differences in gender-based roles in different cultures vary. For instance, some men believe that it is the role of women to stay at home and care for children as it is the case between Kirsten and Enrique (Frame 222). Money is another issue that can bring problems in intercultural marriages. Different cultures have different notions about how money should be spent and who should earn money in the relationship. Money becomes a big issue when influenced by gender-based role expectations (Frame 222). Sexual issues that Frame (222) notes can introduce marital problems because of cultural differences include fidelity, public display of affection, premarital sex, and contraception among others. Other challenges include language barriers, differences in social class, child rearing issues, and religion. Religion may cause a split up in an intercultural marriage in cases where one spouse fails to move from their original religion. For instance, a marriage between Islam and Christians requires one spouse to change their religion and if this does not happen, the couple may split up.
According to Frame (226), there are several approaches that previous authors have given intercultural couples to apply to resolve their marital problems. These include one spouse submitting to the other’s culture and abandoning their culture, embracing a middle ground where each of the spouses lets go of certain attributes of their culture, both spouses abandon their cultures, and developing an agreement that best suits their marriage.
Frame (226), says that to know the best strategy to take, pastoral counselors are important in assisting the couple to establish which approach suits their situation. The pastoral counselor’s goal is to develop a balance in the intercultural marriage. Several factors need to be considered while developing the pastoral counseling strategies. These include developing spiritual and cultural genograms, developing new rituals, redefining cultural challenges and embracing advocacy. Frame (226), asserts that the genograms are effective in reducing emotional reactivity during therapy. Redefining the cultural challenges involves assisting the couples to view their difference or situation as an opportunity in which they can establish their own new culture or identity. This may also translate in couples developing new rituals they can do as a family without the influence of their cultural backgrounds. Finally, Frame (230) notes that for pastoral counselors to increase their effectiveness, they need to learn more about the cultural values and take into consideration factors such as advocacy and redefining cultural challenges.
Work Cited
Frame, Marsha Wiggins. "The Challenges of Intercultural Marriage: Strategies for Pastoral
Care." Pastoral Psychology 52.3 (2004): 219-232. Academic Search Premier.
