Free Gender Socialization Essay Sample

Uncle Bob grew up as the second oldest child of four boys and three girls. His older brother Bill was only sixteen months older than him. He grew up in a typical middle class family in all respects, except his father was often out of town for work. His mother was the one who was in charge in his household when his father was absent, but when his father was home, he governed the family like a military drill sergeant, Bob recalls.
Bob said he learned most about being a man from his big brother, and other boys and men throughout his childhood. He had several sports coaches and teachers who often indirectly taught him how a man should behave. I learned that boys and men are strong and should be independent and responsible.
Bob defines being masculine, in today’s society, as a role that seemed to be easy to fall into while growing up. Being a man means being strong and taking care of your family, Bob indicated. For Bob, that was simple. He had chores around the house that were more appropriate for men, and he always had to ensure his younger siblings were safe.
Bob says he never tried to be anything. His role as a man came naturally in his world. Just being a man meant you were strong. Just being a man meant you had the duty to take care of family. Bob said he never had to put much effort into being masculine because that was how he was born.
Bob did not think that any particular career or lifestyle choice makes an individual more or less masculine. He said he had friends that were very masculine pursue careers in nursing. A job or career does not make a person masculine, Bob said. Simply being a male makes a person masculine, he said.
Bob did admit that the way he thinks now about masculinity and being a man is much different than what he thought as a younger man. Back in my day, Bob said, sometimes it seemed important to show how tough or strong you were just to prove to others that you were a man. But, Bob said, all that was peer pressure and child ways. He was not teased or bullied much and says that maybe these things were different for boys who were.
Bob’s father never really seen the world as Bob does. Although his father died when Bob was thirty, he remembers his father making it a big deal to be strong; even stronger than others, in order to prove oneself. Bob never really agreed with his father’s perception after he hit his mid to late twenties. Bob also recalls his father not respecting men who performed “women’s” jobs. Those who were nurses or office managers or waitresses never had any respect from his father. Bob supposed that his father had this impression because he was taught it from his father.
I was actually very impressed with Bob’s thinking about masculinity. I did not expect him to respond as he did. I went into this interview thinking that Bob would consider masculinity very important. I have not discussed these matters with him before, and although it was very uncomfortable at first, I am glad that I did because I learned a lot about Bob. I also learned that for some boys being a man came easy. But for some, it may have been a little tougher. Although the assignment does not require, I want to discuss this matter with another man who maybe had some struggles with his masculinity growing up.