This study examines the individual personality differences in young adults’ shyness. For a long period, developmental psychologists have focused on shyness in children. Growing evidence of shyness in young adults, especially in college and university levels has prompted researchers to delve deeper into the development of shyness in young adults and how it can be avoided. Shyness in young adults could be genetically predisposed or could be as a result of environmental consequences. The best means of tackling shyness in young adults (in colleges and universities) require synergy between instructors and parents (guardians). Young adults who are shy have always been misunderstood and ridiculed by their peers, parents and society. However, such attacks do not help their situation but only exacerbate their fear and push them further into social withdrawal. Therefore, interventions measures have to their promote understanding and encouragement to develop their social skills.
In psychology, shyness refers to a feeling of apprehension, and lack of comfort. This usually occurs when an individual approaches or is approached by people in an unfamiliar place or new people. Shy people tend to experience behavioral inhibition and even anxiety feelings when they are in social situations. This usually happens in situations in which an individual is conspicuous.
However, people express shyness to different degrees. For example, some people exhibit an extreme form of shyness, a phenomenon referred to as social phobia. Shyness and introversion are two different words that usually get confused. It is essential to note that introverts like to be solitary, but they are not afraid of social encounters (Fox & Schmidt, 1995). However, shy people are always afraid of social encounters.
Shyness can occur in different developmental stages of life. At a certain young developmental age, children tend to be shy. As children grow, they may have poor social skills due to constant criticism from parents, siblings, or other, teasing peers. It is also necessary to point out that shyness has a cultural dimension. People from different cultures react differently to new environments and new people. Shyness could also arise from genes that predispose an individual to be shy, and when the patient-child relationship is not firm.
Shyness has usually been associated with young children. However, shyness is still prevalent in other developmental stages of life. Adults also experience shyness in social settings, but societal expectations may not take that seriously hence the issues is always underreported and studied. For example, young male adults tend to conceal their shyness because it is associated with feminine behavior (Neyer & Asendorpf, 2001). There is a need to understand how shyness occurs across all the developmental stages in order to develop the best strategies for tackling it.
In the past, developmental psychologists have focused exclusively on children. However, there is growing evidence to show that there are a number of young adults who are reportedly shy. The manifestations of shyness in this group could have several challenges. For example, they date less, and even some may end up not committing at all. This arises from the lack of social skills that could go a long way expressing their intimate plans.
In the institutions of higher learning, young, shy adults (in the age of 21 to 40 years) do not fully participate in discussions, and have difficulties in expressing their opinions. From time to, their presentations are always below par as they lack the prerequisite skills of communication. This increases the feelings of guilt and leads to low self-esteem (Crozier & Birdsey, 2003). Therefore, it is necessary to realize the condition of young, shy adults in institutions of higher learning in order to facilitate boosting their learning skills.
Literature review
Shyness in the young adults in college or the university could be related to the passage from the final grades of secondary education. Peer influence could also be against what family and parents advocate for; this leads to withdrawal from being associated with other peers. Shyness differs in the way it is expressed during the developmental stages of life. If an individual is shy during the early stages of life, it does not mean that they would remain shy for the rest of their lives. Adolescents who are shy tend to develop that into their young adult life (around 25 years). Shyness has a cultural dimension. A study conducted in America revealed that Jewish Americans are the least shy people while Asian Americans have higher levels of shyness. In most countries, shyness is considered in a bad light; it is believed to be a weakness or a problem. Shyness occurs to people of all gender, but males try hard to hide their level of shyness. This is because shyness is looked at as a feminine trait in many countries (Schmidt, Miskovic, Boyle, & Miskovic, 2008).
Shyness is expressed in various levels. There are those who experience mild feelings, and there are those who are extremely uncomfortable in social situations leading to anxiety. Shyness interferes with socialization leading to a phenomenon called social withdrawal in young adults. This was established by carrying out a study to determine the multiple components of personality in young adults. The study focused on adults born at extremely low birth weight and normal birth weight. This was carried out for multiple components of personality that determine personality stricture. They were followed from birth and tested for arrange of characteristics during different developmental ages. The range of components examined included cognitive, motivation, socialization, temperament, and affective component. These are some of the characteristics used to define personality structure of individuals (Schmidt, Miskovic, Boyle, & Miskovic, 2008).
Young adult survivors of preterm birth show personality traits that are different from adults born with a normal birth weight. They are extremely cautious and express low levels of extroversion. There is evidence to show that adults who survive preterm births are extremely shy, and have lower sociability. They also experience high levels of behavioral inhibition compared to young adults born in normal birth. As a result, young adults with a low birth weight are prone to emotional/psychiatric problems. Low birth weight infants are more predisposed to emotional disturbances later in life than young adults with a normal birth weight. This contributes to the risk for different emotional problems (Schmidt, Miskovic, Boyle, & Miskovic, 2008).
Studies indicate that, for young adults born with a low birth weight, they do not take risks. On the contrary, young adults born with a normal birth weight tend to be extraverted and take a lot of risks in life. It has been noted that low birth weight infants (less than 1,500 g) are vulnerable to learning difficulties, and have poor health compared to their counterparts (infants with a normal birth weight). Parents with children of low birth weight report of hyperactivity/attention disorders among their children. This may develop later on in life unless medical attention is sought early enough.
Preterm adults are also less likely to be extroverted, and experience negative affectivity. Such adults are less likely to seek positive affectivity and have decreased sensation seeking attributes. It is for this reason that it is believed that they are at a higher risk of experiencing mental health problems. (Fox & Schmidt, 1995)
Activity
The best strategies for encouraging shy university students to be more outgoing need to be practiced at both the school and home environment. For example, it is necessary for parents to relate the events in which they were also shy. This reduces the feeling of guilt in the young adult since they would not feel ashamed about being grown up and shy. Parents have an immense influence on the behavior their children hence by disclosing about how they dealt with the situation, it would make the student feel better and be more confident (Benham, 2006).
The parent/guardian can also impart an outgoing behavior in the young adult by explaining the benefits. It has been observed that young adults tend to engage in behavior if they expect benefit from it. For example, the parent can explain that by being outgoing, they will have more friends and have fun. It is also necessary to identify role models in that field who had to overcome shyness in order to excel in that certain profession (Hampes, 2005).
Another means of controlling shyness would be to empathize with the young adult. This is best expressed when the young adult does not want to go out and interact with their fellow college mates. If a parent empathizes with the young adult, he/she would feel understood. This helps the young adult to identify and talk about their emotions and search for a means of controlling them. It is unwise to label young adults as shy because they tend to perfect that behavior and they mature up knowing that they are shy. As a result, they make little or no efforts in trying to change. It is essential to encourage young adults to share their emotions with their parents. This enables them to identify and share their feelings and emotions (Zhao, Kong, & Wang, 2012).
Parents can also reward outgoing behavior. Rewarding the young adult for an outgoing behavior can go a lot in terms of encouraging them to be more outgoing. Reward system is a proven motivator for human beings. Another strategy that can help is to encourage reading books of people who had considerable difficulties before overcoming their shyness and prospered (Caspi & Silva, 1995).
Young adults who are shy could easily be misunderstood by their instructors or their peers. The peers may think that the shy student does not want to get along with them. On the other hand, instructors may think of an inattentive student. However, this is not true because the student may want to be with the rest of the peers but does not know what to say or even start a conversation. It becomes hard when they are placed in a large group discussion (Spere, Schmidt, Theall-Honey, & Martin-Chang, 2004). They may play a subtle role, and may be tempted to sit and be done with the discussion. They simply do not have the guts to express their mind. It becomes hard if they have to present something.
The best way to deal with this is to form small discussion groups where the students feel comfortable expressing their ideas and opinions. This offers the best opportunity not only for students to understand and tolerate one another, but also provides an opportunity to develop interpersonal skills. Small groups help shy students to gather and boost their confidence levels. However, in a large group discussion shy students will not participate fully for fear that other group members would be critical or judgmental of their ideas. This is some of the classroom activities that may boost participation of shy students in discussions.
Discussion
In young adults, shyness is expressed in the form of avoiding romantic relationships and work relationships. This is based on selective memory of some bitter interactions. Such young adults may also tend to underestimate themselves and always take the blame for failure; however, they fear taking credit for success. It is essential to note that shy young adults do not enlist the help of other people, even when it is necessary, since they fear to express their opinions. They are also less likely to deal with stressful conditions since they engage in a lot of self-evaluation.
Shy adults pursue different directions of life depending on their gender. For example, it has been found out that shy girls tend to get married early in life and start homemaking earlier than their counterparts. This is not true for their male counterparts as they settle later in life; they delay marriage to a later point in life. Researchers have noted that young, shy adults do not make full use of the employment chances that come their way because they are not confident in settling in occupational pursuits.
There is evidence to show that shyness is a genetic component. Shyness in adults can be traced back to their childhood, up to the age of three. Even as early as at two years, children exhibit boldness or restraint. As they grow older, their different temperaments can be displayed in social settings such as in the playground. Shyness could be genetically predisposed (Shiner, Masten, & Roberts, Childhood Personality Foreshadows Adult Personality and Life Outcomes Two Decades Later, 2003). It could be passed on from one generation to another, from great-grandparents to parents. For siblings, identical twins are likely to exhibit the same level of shyness.
However, environmental triggers play a crucial role in shaping the shyness temperament. Such environmental triggers include a sense of insecurity, criticism from parents, school surrounding that is stressful, dominating siblings and family conflicts. An intense form of shyness leads to a disorder called social anxiety disorder in young adults. People with this disorder tend to avoid interpersonal contact. It could also lead to a feeling of embarrassment in social settings. This leads to social withdrawal as most people consider it to be a problem.
Social fears, as well as anxiety, play a key role in the development of social withdrawal. They lead unhappy lives as they do not make enough friends. This is a phenomena referred to a conflicted shyness. However, if it based on the lack of motivation, it is referred to as social disinterest (Beaton, Schmidt, Ashbaugh, Santesso, Antony, & McCabe, 2008). Excess shyness is noted through sweating hands, blushing, stammering, stuttering, and difficulty in thinking about what to say when people are around. Reluctance to pay, go to school, and avoiding eye contact could be other factors used to gauge if they are unable to communicate well.
It is necessary to note that there are some things that take up the time meant for socializing in young adults. This includes indulging in web surfing, playing CD-ROM games as well as other computer related activities. Nowadays, exchange of information takes place in an imposed medium which further diverts the young adults from engaging in activities that make shyness disappear. There is a danger in this in the sense that too much of cyberspace cannot replace human relationships. This is in the light of the many people who prefer to have an online chat instead of face-face socialization. With time, the traditional socialization means are being replaced with online ones. (Amichai-Hamburger, Wainapel, & Fox, 2004)
Researchers and theorists believe that the shyness trait develops due to two main reasons. One of them is the genetic predisposition and the second one is due to disruptions in the development of a child. It is believed that social inhibition develops before shyness in infants (Hampes, 2005). At nine months, children develop a fear for strangers. However, if this avoidant behavior does not end after three years, then the child could be labeled as shy.
Emotional sensitivity is closely associated with shyness. However, it cannot be used to determine emotionality and neuroticism. It has been noted that high sensitivity is associated with shyness and negative affectivity. This occurs when children are exposed to negative childhood environment (Benham, 2006).
Conclusion
Shyness could be reinforced or modeled depending on the environment. For example, parents may condition inhibition in young adults if they intimidate, or encourage wariness of others to avoid getting hurt during childhood. This later develops into anxiety and uncertainty in the child through adolescence and young adult life.
For young adults in college or the university, there are some hurdles when they transfer or join their institutions. First of all, the encounter in the new school environment is quite challenging as they have to interact with other students and make friends. Shy students may not be able to fit well into the new environment, especially if their communication skills are not fit or if they come from poor backgrounds (Schmidta, Santessob, Schulkinc, & Segalowitz, 2007). Researchers have noted that students who come from rich backgrounds or have excellent communication skills do quite well in making new friends and settling in on a new school environment. Teachers could encourage such students, motivate them, and if they note apprehension, they can call the students up to contribute to discussions. This is a convenient way of getting the students involved.
There are studies that associate minor depression with internet use for long periods without interacting. As a result, young people may find themselves in situations in which they cannot handle by themselves and just succumb to the pressure (Henriksen & Murberg, 2009).
It is common for shy people to be perceived in a negative way by others. It is possible for them to hold onto those negative emotions that they have. Shyness has cultural dimensions, and it has been noted that people from some cultures are less shy compared to people from other cultures. In the current world scenario, technology plays a critical role in postulating shy behavior.
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