Free Will You Marry Me Literature Review Example

Among the saleable list of material items romance has been included both as a commodity and as an exchange means for other commodities. Taking advantage of the feebleness of humans’ inability to control their appetite and conspicuous growth in that weakness, the media has assisted immensely in fueling the concept of love as an idea, a mere delight for entertainment or a clown for the circus. The needs of just one man are unlimited and as he evolves, as years pass by, there is an expansion in the list of things to buy. Off which most are irrelevant to his existence. But because of societal pressure and influence he purchases them anyway. In recent love relationships, it has become paramount that if two people will survive or escape its boredom it must involve embellishment of some activities like a visit to the restaurant, the man buying flowers often, soft pillow tones that tickle the senses and create a magical feeling or go to the movies and have his arms embracing her 24 hours and making her feel like even his mother is worth nothing compared to her. And that people is how the media, novels, magazines, internet, movies, drama and soap operas present it; you know the guy with the muscular, soft hairy chest and the Krishna voice. All this activities tell her these fantasies can come true, all she has to do is create it.
Therefore I am of the same mind with the author that romance is cultural rather than interpersonal phenomenal. In my analysis of this thesis I will construct my fact from a statement that is seemingly out of context in this book “will you marry me” but plays out rightly to give a dividing line between love and romance. Philip wrote “illusion only is sacred, truth is profane.” The context of this argument is a backbone used to support his opinion that facts are more convincing than truth, especially in the present generation in which anything comes as truth, e.g. that consumption of romance saves a relationship is true. Romance the dictionary defines as a temporary relationship. Even further illusion is highly revered than truth. I mean how do you convince a person that what is said or felt towards them exist or is true? An illusion is also a fantasy. An appearance of a thing not real but appearing to be. Joel in the play brought forward by Ludwig was in love with Annie; conclusively one can say she was contented because she never asked questions of doubt. At least the author did not include in the play that she wanted flowers or whatever but, like he rightly used, “bedeviled by his insecurities and motivated by the will to make a nice and lasting impression on his girlfriend,” he did something that aside from the expressions of feelings and words would be as an emblem of his love for her. The idea of consuming romance begins in the mind and processed in thought before physical action can be taken. The consequence of this is that an obsession, addiction or an insatiable hunger is generated. In every bid to gratify self, the relationship is twisted and converted from independent sentimentality into a trade by barter form of relationship. That is “Man's Company + Money=Woman's Company +?”
The media is the mastermind behind this concept of consumption of romance. With it gimmicks, it has maligned the true image of love as a clown for the circus and suggest activities that can be digested to make more spectacle of it than it already is. The essentials of a real relationship is the coming together of two people to build on the foundation of intimacy a long lasting impression that will plunge them forever into a life of oneness. Such intimacy is intended to feel the vacuum of a longing or craving for commitment toward the other person. In this light such a person is meant to be loved, adored or placed in high regards irrespective of differences or existing flaws. The edification of that relationship will be purely based on concept of morals and intimacy. This simple practice fortifies their marriage from breakups. But the author’s claim is this is no longer the case with most love relationships. And this is where the consumptions of romance come in.
Like earlier mentioned the media fuels this process of romance consumptions with images impressed on the mind of the victim like glue. It gives a notion that there is the need to spice it up a little bit and even proffers likely solutions on how to establish such grounds. These solutions are packaged in Novels, advertised on newspapers, magazines and the internet and acted in television soap operas, dramas and movies in such a manner that beguiles the viewer. Once the product is registered on the mind of the viewer, the next line of action is how to purchase that commodity. With consistent paying of attention to the media there is a tendency that the commodity will be bought either based on the discretion of one or pressure from the other.
I recall a friend told me about his relationship with a college girl. It was a fresh year for the both and they were barely one year into the relationship. Pretty Becky as she is popularly called was beautiful and admired by every guy. Soon these other guys began making advances and the so called super cool girls who wanted her in their clique would advise her to go for a down-to-earth person rather than him. Bret, my friend, did not have much to give her. He was just a simple guy still under his parent. I remember him said he gave her all attention and assured her always that he loved her. But it seems those words fell on deaf ears. It was just a matter of time she gave in to the attention and became the most talked about. She had a new look and her sudden change in attitude was seriously dramatic. When they were together, after the change, she would talk to him about going to the movies often and seeing places. She would talk about the beautiful things on the media and wishes she could have them. To keep the relationship going Bret would steal from his dad just to make sure he bought her what she wanted. For some time he tried keeping up, later when he realized that Becky demands were insatiable he quitted the relationship.
Another story was told to me by my dad about how he and my mom played it out in their relationships those days. He said my mother during her teen days was accustomed with the media and therefore spent hours observing the media to know what information it had on nearly everything from fashion to movies to music and so on. One of her favorite actors then was the titanic lover boy Leonardo Diccaprio. He said everywhere and anywhere they went she would call him, my dad, Leo. He said why she called him that name he never understood. Until one day in a conversation their likes and dislikes she spoke of making a heaven out of their relationship. One way she had plan to achieve it was to save some money and travel with my dad to Hollywood where they would see Leonardo and her other favorite actors
It is obvious from the two stories that the consumptions of romance evolved from fantasies. They are deeply rooted in the mind and it influence only get worse when given attention. Becky a good girl turned bad was influenced by her friends and the media. Soon everything around are seem to make sense and she imagined how wonderful they would be if she fit in. This kind of idea starts to question whether Bret truly loved her, what kind of man Bret will be when they get married. Will he be fun or boring? In the second story my mom was going to save all the money in the world to go see some actor who might definitely be too busy with other girls to even glimpse at her – at least she might get an autograph. The money if saved could be spent on better things or saved for the future. Bret because of his insecurity stole from his dad to fulfill Becky fantasies, soon he quitted the moment he realized that her wants are insatiable.
I think people ought to have control over themselves and shun the media often. It is that way they can imbibe the essence of relationships and build the road to an independent, long-lasting relationship, instead of going to the internet like Joel did in the story brought forward by Ludwig to get advice on how to make relationships work. The media creates an obsession, an addiction that makes one feel like they are sick without these things. Like Philip had pointed out in his book, “beside self-expression, romance allowed those who have learned how to consume it properly to feel liberated from the drudgery of work.”
Well if I was Joel I will play it differently. Let me first introduce myself. I am confident and honest about my feelings. When I’m in a relationship like Joel, my woman would know instantly my kind of person because we will swim in communication all the time. Yes I will take her out once in a while but not for the purpose of trying to make a “long lasting impression.” When it comes to that crucial moment of forever and always, it will be just me and my woman. I will go down on one knee with the ring staring in her face and spit the words. Once I get a yes I will make her a nice dinner with exotic wine to step down with.