I’m in the 6%
I’m in the 6%
Hello everyone. I would like to welcome you to this talk on the advantages of living together before marriage. Please note that this presentation is done from the perspective of a woman, and while two of the source contributions are from everyday women’s voices, the third woman’s voice heard here is that of a psychologist. In taking the positive spin on this question of cohabitation, I plan on addressing three areas. First is a women’s take on what are the “good” reasons for living together. Second, I will throw some statistics out to you, showing that cohabitation is becoming the norm in more western societies. Third, I will give you psychologist DiDonato’s list of the five types of cohabiters. This way, and just for fun, you can see where you fit in, or where you would like to fit in when you cohabitate. So let’s begin.
I took a look at the all women talk about love site and looked at two of the women bloggers’ observations on the good in cohabitation. Here is what these women agreed on:
Good Reason #1– Financially it is a smart move, for couples can either save for a wedding, trip or some other big item; or better yet, they can pay off their student loans.
Good Reason #2 – Practically, the two of you can get to know each other; your quirks and habits; what you can work with and what you can’t stand.
Good Reason #3 – Essentially it provides a great opportunity to share tasks and responsibilities, like paying half the bills and not having to do all the dishes. I like this one.
Good Reason #4 – Romantically you get to see each other all the time. You learn how to balance the romance and passion with the everyday challenges of life.
Good Reason #5 – It’s a good test to see if you can make it as a couple. It helps you both see if you are on the same path in the end. Dreams of romance are great at the dating stage, but will they last. Well take the test and find out (D. & Fannin, n.d.).
So there you have it five good solid reasons to cohabitate. Now let’s check out the statistics.
U.S. studies for the years 2006-2010 found that out of 12,000 heterosexual women, ages of 15-44, at least 48% of them were cohabitating (DiDonato, 2014). In addition, there has been a changing trend in cohabitation. Recorded in 995 cohabitation last for an average of 13 months, and yet now, it is 22 months (DiDonato, 2014). So why do couples cohabitate? Well in answering the question why, studies have shown that 61.2% want to spend more time together; 18.5% say it makes more financial sense; 14.3% want to give the relationship a test run before marriage; and 6% don’t believe in the institution of marriage (DiDonato, 2014). So as we can see, the research directly reflects what practical experience shows.
Psychologist DiDonato (2014) lists five types of cohabitating couples. Now when I list these, if you are in a cohabitating relationship, see if you can find where you fit in; if you aren’t in a cohabitating relationship, then where you like would to fit in. Okay, so here is the list:
Incongruent Engaged Cohabiters – They are engaged couples who disagree about how long till they get married. They make up 47% of cohabiters.
Engaged Cohabiters Moving Fast – This group are engaged couples who are moving fast toward marriage. They make up 13% of cohabiters.
Engaged Cohabiters Moving Slow – They are like the last group only they are moving slowly toward marriage. They make up 20% of cohabiters.
Incongruent Non-Engaged Cohabiters – These are couples who are not engaged and disagree as to whether or how long it will be until they get married. They make up 20% of cohabiters.
So now you have it, the reasons living together makes a lot of sense as it appears even research supports there is a growing trend toward living together. Thank you for listening and happy cohabitating.
References
D. (n.d.).7 Reasons Why living together before marriage is a good thing . Retrieved from http://love.allwomenstalk.com/reasons-why-living-together-before-marriage-is-a-good-thing
DiDonato, T. E. (25 July 2014). Should you move-in together, or not? Retrieved from https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/meet-catch-and-keep/201407/should-you-move-in-together-or-not
Fannin, A. (n.d.). Know the pros and cons of moving in together before you take that leap . Retrieved from http://love.allwomenstalk.com/know-the-pros-and-cons-of-moving-in-together-before-you-take-that-leap
