Introduction
Children are basically in need of love and affection. The attention they get from people surrounding them invokes a distinct impact on how they develop as individuals. When it comes to issues of being abandoned and later on adopted by foster parents, children often find it a blessing to have good alternative choices of having a family; but the completion of one’s being does not pull through especially if the child begins to understand the reality of things and how all the said matters do impose on the overall identity of the child as he grows further into maturity. Practically, the sense of belongingness among children is an important part of the process by which they realize their self-worth. Notably, it could be understood that it is through the realization of such concept of personal identity that a person embraces a more meaningful condition of existence. In the presentation that follows, a definite indication on why children who are adopted should be given the chance to find and locate their parents and have [perhaps] a brief conversation with them as they try to inquire on matters that they may not fully understand yet.
History and Background of Adoption
Adoption is the process by which parents or couples [or at times even single individuals] seek to find a child for them to take care of. The age-range of those who are usually put for adoption usually come between 0-12 years old. Those who are older than the said group often end up not being picked, therefore pushing them to find their ways and taking different options that are usually destructive in nature. Notably the adoption procedures could be considered tedious in nature. It could be analyzed that when it comes to developing a sense of control especially for the sake of mandating a determinable course of direction, the adoption procedures taken into account by legitimate agencies are necessary to make sure of the legal measures that are important especially when it comes to securing the capacity of individuals involved in the agreement to uphold their promise of taking care of the children they are aiming to adopt.
Relatively, undergoing the procedures of development as a child grows older, the adoptive parents often grow fond of the children they adopted; this is a necessary requirement for foster parents to cultivate. Assuring the children of a good life is not enough in this case. It could be understood that the essence of personal being and personal identity lies on the hope of knowing from where one comes from and from where he is heading. As an adopted child grows, it is given that he would be able to encounter such points of consideration. With such assumption of factual requirement, foster parents ought to know better on how to manage the ways by which they deal with their adopted children, especially when it comes to opening their doors towards the possibility of the children to look for their biological parents.
Why Adopted Children should be Allowed to Find their Biological Parents
Adopted children need to see their biological parents simply because doing so shall complete them. Setting aside the fear of losing their children, foster parents should see to it that they provide their adopted children with the support and reasonable decision making that these young ones expect from them. Why the fear of losing the children? The old saying that goes on to say that ‘blood is thicker than water’ insists on the fact that when it comes to determining the psychology behind parenthood, parents ought to desire to be the ones closest to their children to assure them of proper growth and stronger being. On the other hand, there are instances when blood overcomes the foundation that the foster parents need to give attention to. The desire to belong is something that is most often related to knowing where one comes from. Although a child might seemingly not be affected by the chaotic situation of going from bad to worse, he is of course entitled of observing matters surrounding him. Parenthood takes a toll on every individual’s being, including those who might not have been able to experience the real meaning of parenthood because half the time, they are doing something else. However, when proper management is applied to the being of those affected by the situation [especially the parents], it is most likely that they would be able to assist the young ones into embracing the meaning of having a real family. Parents are given the chance to mold their children into young individuals, and foster parents carry the same load. Notably, the art of parenthood lies on the capacity of one to control herself and especially with regards being frequently angry especially when it comes to disciplining the young ones.
The hard work that parents put forward to support the needs of their adopted child often become questioned especially when the involvement of solid parenthood comes into the picture. It must be remembered that when dealing with issues regarding families and other members of the unit, parents should be able to measure the factors contributing to the situation in full balance of the pros and cons of their decisions. This is where the idea of letting the adopted children see the other parent/s regularly. Hopefully, the recovery that humans would be witnessing does provide a bit of personal realization among themselves therefore improving their value towards life and using their experience as source of greater heights in their hope of becoming better individuals instead of simply wallowing over the idea of being an adopted child. As the children grow, it is given that their desire for a better personal being becomes intense. Foster parents should know better than to fear the idea of having their children lose their love for the ones who took good care of them as they grow into maturity. Meeting the real parents and having them answer questions from the children themselves provide a distinct picture of imbalance especially when it comes to giving attention to the children’s desires first before the need to give attention to more important things such as discipline.
Conclusion
Seeing through how parental assistance helps a child develop into maturity, so does the course of knowing the reality behind who an adopted child’s parents are makes it easier for one to accept full knowledge of his personal being. Notably, in this discussion, it is insisted that adopted children learn more about their original parents for both personal and psychological reasons. Knowing where someone comes from, is such a blessing to the children. Even adopted children ought to know of such rights. Knowing so shall allow the young ones realize the real meaning of being able to belong to something; a united connection that bonds the emergence of such realization with the hope of defining the path of development that is to be followed by adapted children accordingly. With the desire to know more about himself, an adopted child should be open to seeing and meeting his biological parents as part of his personal journey towards maturity.
References
Askeland, Lori. Children and Youth in Adoption, Orphanages, and Foster Care: A Historical Handbook and Guide (2005) excerpt and text search
Carp, E. Wayne, ed. Adoption in America: Historical Perspectives (2002)
Carp, E. Wayne. Family Matters: Secrecy and Disclosure in the History of Adoption (2000)
Carp, E. Wayne. Jean Paton and the Struggle to Reform American Adoption (University of Michigan Press; 2014) 422 pages; Scholarly biography of an activist (1908-2002) who led the struggle for open adoption records
Conn, Peter. Adoption: A Brief Social and Cultural History (2013) excerpt and text search
Fessler, Ann. The Girls Who Went Away: The Hidden History of Women Who Surrendered Children for Adoption in the Decades Before Roe v. Wade (2007) excerpt and text search
Gailey, Christine Ward. Blue-Ribbon Babies and Labors of Love: Race, Class, and Gender in U.S. Adoption Practice (University of Texas Press; 185 pages; 2010). Uses interviews with 131 adoptive parents in a study of how adopters' attitudes uphold, accommodate, or subvert prevailing ideologies of kinship in the United States.
