Sexuality is part of the human condition. It is also intimately personal; this applies to everyone on the planet. It does not matter if you are on People Magazine’s list of The 10 Most Beautiful, physically disabled or mentality impaired. Individuals with disabilities experience sexual desires like everyone else. However, just the same way that a disability may affect diet and exercise, it can affect how a disabled person experiences their sexuality. It is important to remember though; sexuality just does not go away, no more than hunger and the need to eat.
When I started going through the list of links I became offended. They were all about how caregivers, parents and doctors could approach sexual education and treatments for children and mentally impaired adults. They were more about educating and protecting patients. It felt patronizing, as if disabled people had no ability to think for themselves. Still, some of them had good insight into how a person might experience sexuality. I particularly liked how the Better Health Channel expressed it when they wrote, “Sexuality is a key part of human nature.” . That insight is very true. Nevertheless, it is not just the disabled who have self-image problems and worries about body image and the attitudes of others. That is part of the human condition. They might be greater for the disabled; however, they are the same concerns.
The University of Michigan had a particularly good quote about children growing up with disabilities that I would like to share. They observed that, “Young people with disabilities are no different from other kids in their need to understand their bodies and relationships; they, too, need to understand how their bodies work, and may have romantic longings and sexual interests.” . There again was that qualifying “may” of course they have “romantic longings and sexual interests.” They are people, disabled or not people have longings and desires.
Planned Parenthood had the most extensive resources for adults talking to children about sexuality. However, this was one of the sites where I expected to find adult content on how disabled adults could approach investigating their own sexuality. Unfortunately, although I search for it using several different keyword combinations I could not find any adult content.
At this point, I was at the section of the list where the link was for United Cerebral Palsy and ready to agree completely when I read the part that said, “Persons with disabilities have the same sexual and reproductive health needs as other people yet they often face barriers to information.” . I was starting to get completely frustrated myself. There was plenty of information on how to learn about sexual anatomy, birth control and how to protect a vulnerable person from a potential predator, but nothing on how pleasurable it could be for a disabled person to develop a fulfilling intimate adult relationship that included sexuality.
The Wrong Planet was the first site that approached sexuality from a first person adult view. I read the reviews on “If You Could Say It In Words” or do a site search for “Sexuality” but could not find a link to watch the movie. Luckily, there were several articles and other informative posts, comments and other insights into how it felt to be involved in an adult partnership relationship that included sexuality. Calder was good as well. They encouraged disabled people to explore themselves and their partners sexuality using whatever it took and “gave permission” for disabled people to use whatever was “acceptable and pleasurable to them.”
Although frustrating at times, this was an interesting assignment, and ultimately an enjoyable one. It gave me insight into not only how a disabled person can approach sexuality but also how helpful information sites might increase their feelings of being marginalized. The differences in tone and attitude were quite different between the sites written by disabled people for each other and the sites where a disabled person did not write most of the material.
Works Cited
Better Health Channel. "Disability and sexual Issues." 5 2011. Better Health Channel. 14 4 2012
Centre for Neuro Skills. "Sexuality Search Results." 2012. Centre for Neuro Skills. 14 4 2012
Cook, Ph.D., Judith A. "Sexuality and People with Psychiatric Disabilities." 17 3 2000. University of Illinois at Chicago. 14 4 2012
Cullins, Vanessa. "Talking to Kids About Sex and Sexuality." 2012. Planned Parenthood. 14 4 2012
Education.com. "Sexuality Instruction and Autism Spectrum Disorders ." 2012. Education.Com. 14 4 2012
Epilepsy Foundation. "Search Results Sexuality." 2012. Epilepsy Foundation. 14 4 2012
Fox Internet Services. "The Impact of Disabilities on Female Sexuality." 2012. The-Clitoris.Com. 14 4 2012
Joint Position Statement of AAIDD and The Arc. "Sexuality." 2012. American Association on Intellectual and Developmental Disabilities. 13 4 2012
Louis Calder Memorial Library. "Sexuality in Spinal Cord Injury." 2009. Louis Calder Memorial Library. 14 4 2012
National Dissemination Center for Children with Disabilities. "Sexuality Eduucation for Students with Disabilities." 3 2010. National Dissemination Center for Children with Disabilities. 14 4 2012
National MS Society. "Search Results -- Sexuality." 2012. National MS Society. 14 4 2012
Plank, Alex. "Loving Someone With Aspergers Syndrome." 2012. Wrong Planet. 14 4 2012
United Cerebral Palsy. "Sexuality." 2012. United Cerebral Palsy. 14 4 2012
University of Michigan. "Sexuality Education for Youth with Disability or Chronic Illness - A Resource List." 7 2010. University of Michigan. 14 4 2012
