When you are not looking for love and love arrives at your doorstep, how would you respond? Would you welcome it with open arms or scare it away? If age is not an issue, would you let love guide you towards your love or would you let love run its course? If your heart finds a way to a far away land, would you let distance separate you or would you fly to the clouds to be with your love?
Marco is an only child from a wealthy family whose dream is to find someone who would love him dearly and listen to all his stories. Spoiled and used to all the pampering he gets from girls, he has had a lot of relationships already, and yet, not one of those relationships ended at the altar. At 28, he has yet to meet the one who would make him commit to a long and committed relationship. Jessie is a successful IT manager, but bored with her life. At 40, she is at the pinnacle of her career, and yet, she knows there is something tugging at her heart – a long-lasting relationship. Her past boyfriends promised her marriage, but all ended in vain as they met other women and left Jessie behind. Soon, Jessie found solace with her online friends and that is how she met Marco.
Both looking for the same thing, they found solace on one another. They enjoyed each other's company and soon, spent days and nights chatting with each other. Gradually, their worlds began to revolve around one another until they realized that slowly, they were beginning to fall deeply in love with each other. It was the perfect kind of love – there was love, trust, humor, and all other attributes that an ideal relationship should have. Despite the huge age difference, they connected well as their souls spoke with each other. They longed to see each other and they both even made plans to visit in a couple of months. For Marco, Jessie was a loving and nurturing being who was the answer to his prayers as she pampered him with words and provided the stability he was looking for in relationships. For Jessie, Marco's youth reminded her that there is more to life than working too much. She felt the love she was longing for in her daily online trysts with Marco. Theirs was the perfect kind of relationship that answered both their needs, only, they lived continents apart and neither was willing to live in each other's country.
As their relationship turned from friendship to a real one, expectations that the other would consider moving to permanently to each other's locations arose. This began the change in the relationship between Marco and Jessie. The once happy and full of life and laughter relationship started to display cracks on the relationship. Both were adamant that the other party should be the one to move and not him or her. Soon enough, Marco began looking the other way, while Jessie entertained suitors from her office. The once happy relationship turned sour and they drifted away from each other as their fights took the love and energy they once shared.
The Explanation
Everyone has a love story to tell. For some, the experience may be a good one, while for others, the concept of love is what caused them pain in the heart. Sometimes, this pain becomes permanent that the individual who experienced a painful relationship do not attempt to fall in love again. People who love and those who lost love have various definitions of what love really is; and, depending on their experience, the meaning of the word changes. The same thing is true when it comes to identifying factors that makes a relationship successful. However, there is no one definition or formula that will define or describe what true love is because love defies time, distance, and age.
The story is all about a long-distance, May-December affair between two star-crossed individuals who are both seeking the perfect kind of love. In their case, they proved the importance of time in relationships. The connection that both had grew and developed as they spent more time together. Although online, the love that they had only confirmed that in relationships, spending quality time spells the difference between a successful and a failed relationship (Ballew). Despite not seeing each other face-to-face, Marco and Jessie experienced the kind of relationship that they wanted. It could also be that they mistook their online relationship as an ideal one because of their need for love considering that upon meeting each other online, somehow, the questions and reservations they have about love were answered.
Furthermore, their love story attests that age is not an issue when it comes to relationships considering that Jessie was much older than Marco was. Society generally frowns at May-December relationships especially when the woman is the one older than the man is. Relationships are judged negatively as people think of future problems the couple might face in the future, including health issues, having a family, and insecurity and jealous feelings involved (eHarmony). What attracted Marco to Jessie is her caring and loving ways as he thought that in "real life", Jessie would also be nurturing and loving towards him and not only online. Marco's behavior could be due to his constant need of pampering which he perceived that Jessie is capable of giving him. In addition, the difference in age proves that when love is great in a relationship, it is capable of making people meet halfway in order to satisfy the intellectual and emotional needs of each other.
Finally, Marco and Jessie's relationship demonstrates that love is possible to grow in long-distance relationships if guided by honesty, patience, and encouragement (Knight). Despite living in different continents, Marco and Jessie developed what seemed like an honest and ideal relationship based on love as they even thought about living together someday. However, this same element of their relationship was the one that caused the breakup of their connection. Considering the deep love they had for each other, neither one was open to the idea of leaving their home country as it meant being away from family and friends. While long-distance relationships works for some, there are those who are unwilling to bend their principles when it comes to their living situation, thus, the falling apart of what could be a beautiful love story.
I used to think that long-distance relationships and May-December affairs do not work. However, Marco and Jessie's love story changed my thinking even though they did not end up together. Now, my belief is that regardless of age and distance, as long as the love is pure and both are willing to give up something in order to gain something (in their case, compromise about the living situation just to be together), then there is no reason for a relationship not to work out. Thus, individuals' convictions about love and relationships should complement factors such as time, age, and distance to guarantee success of the relationship.
Works Cited
Ballew, John. "Relationship Tip: The Importance of Time Together." Bodymindsoul.org. n.d. Web. 22 May 2013. <http://bodymindsoul.org/2012/05/relationship-tip-the-importance-of-time-together/>.
eHarmony. "Does Age Matter." eHarmony Advice. 2012. Web. 22 May 2013. <http://www.eharmony.co.uk/relationship-advice/dating/2012/05/does-age-matter#.UZ12eleJjDs>.
Knight, Faith Murphy. "Making Your Long-Distance Relationship Work." Discovery Fit & Health. n.d. Web. 23 May 2013. <http://health.howstuffworks.com/relationships/advice/making-your-long-distance-relationship-work1.htm>.
