The way parents raise their children often depends on a number of circumstances, ranging from cultural practices and outside influences. One could argue that there is no greater a cultural divide than that between the United States and China in terms of education and politics. Social media has often debated on the existence of the “tiger mom” - the image of the patriarchal, dominating Chinese mother who stops at nothing to raise her child to be the best at virtually everything. In contrast, the American mother’s relationship with her child(ren) is seen as more relaxed and flexible in its nature.
The Chinese education system is one that is rigid in nature, devoid of heavy focus on its sports culture unlike that of the United States. The freedoms American parents allow their children vastly differ from the climate in China, where children are taught to focus on their studies almost exclusively. On the contrary, the relationship between American parents and their children tend to focus on allowing them the flexibility to choose what they want to learn and how. Charter schools, arts schools, trade school, and community schools, some of which are performing-arts based, allows parents to communicate less authoritatively than th
eir Chinese counterparts. The Chinese install a sense of accountability from their children with “such instrumental values as respect for authority, respect for work, and the preservation of order and traditional structure” (Chao, et al, 94). Because of such firm standards, their children place the control of their lives in the hands of their parents, whereas their American peers are encouraged to take control of their own lives and divert away from the desires of their parents.
In China, parenting has also depended on governmental rule. It is widely known that Chinese parents were limited to having only one child at a time, a rule which has recently been overturned. Comparatively, parents in the United States have been allowed to have as many children as they want with little interference from their government - a freedom that allows for a casual way of relating to their children. In addition, Chinese parents typically demanded more from their children, expecting them to get more A’s in class, directed their children towards certain occupations, and were more strict, consistent and “task-oriented” in weekend activities (Chao, et al, 100). This strict regimen promotes the adage that a child’s peers should have little influence on the decisions their children make. The parental influence therefore, is much stronger than that between American children and their parents.
In closing, the task of raising children is by far, an issue of great concern to parents in both the United States and China. The difference in the relationship between these parents and their children is marked by varying cultural traditions and beliefs. Traditionally, parents of Chinese students encourage them to excel in education whereas American parents typically allow their children a little more freedom of expression in their educational careers. American culture’s flexible learning avenues and fractured parental structure, promotes a more flexible training regimen that often fails in matching the academic progress of Chinese-born children. The differences in how children communicate with their parents depends much on the cultural traditions passed down through generations. The political climate, which had allowed China few individual freedoms as their American counterparts, thrives on a society where order is coveted and education is revered as the highest level of achievement. Though every parent wants success for their child, they way they achieve that end is quite different.
References
Chao, Ruth K., and Stanley Sue. “Chinese parental influence and their children’s school success:
A paradox in the literature on parenting styles.” Growing up the Chinese way: Chinese
child and adolescent development(1996): 93-120.
