At 4:00am, my alarm clock begins to go off. Still exhausted from the night before, I begin to rise out of bed. In the middle of winter, it’s dark outside. The house is freezing. I take a deep breath and get out of bed to begin my day. As a single mother raising three children, I work two jobs just to make ends meet. I am due to report to my first job, at the local hotel, at 6:00am sharp. It’s minimum wage and physically grueling work, but it’s a job that puts food on the table for my children and me.
As I pull the covers off and step onto the floor, a chill runs through me. To help save money, I don’t turn the heat on unless it is 0 degrees or less outside. Out from under the blankets and my nice warm bed, the cold air of the morning hits me hard. I begin to shiver, and I feel my teeth chattering. I feel the cold, hard floor beneath me as I walk down the hall towards the bathroom.
We live in a small trailer with one bathroom between the four of us. My children are still asleep and won’t be awake for a few more hours, so I have the bathroom to myself. I turn the water on and let it run until it heats up. A hot shower in the morning is one of the few luxuries I indulge in. I don’t know how I would start my day, especially when it’s so cold, without a hot shower. When I step under the water, I let out a sigh of relief. The hot water feels so good, like a warm blanket enveloping me from the cold. I relish the feeling as I shampoo and condition my hair and wash my body all over. I let out an internal groan when I know I must get out of the shower. Reluctantly, I turn the knob, and the warm water stops running. Once again, I am exposed to the frigid air and my teeth begin chattering. I quickly step out of the shower, dry off, and head back to my bedroom to dress for the morning.
My first job is with a hotel maid service, so I put on my maid uniform. It consists of a plain blue jumper and an apron. My first job ends at 2:00pm, and directly from that job, I go to my second job that begins at 2:30pm. I work as a waitress at a diner for my second job. Each morning, I must pack the stuff I need for the day because I do not have time to come home if I forget anything. I make sure to remember my diner uniform and place it in the bag.
After packing my clothes into the bag, I go into the kitchen to pack my lunch and dinner. Because we live on a shoestring budget, I cannot afford to purchase lunch or dinner if I forget to pack it. While I’m in the kitchen, I prepare lunch for my three children and place it on the counter. After I have packed my children’s lunches and my own, I give each of my children a kiss goodbye. My children are ages 13, 8, and 5. Because we are poor, they all share a bedroom together. I know it is difficult on my oldest daughter, Cora, sharing a bedroom with younger brothers, but she is such a good girl. She never complains.
Most mornings when I go into my children’s rooms, they are sound asleep. This morning, however, my youngest son, 5-year old Dillon, is awake. His breathing is shallow and heavy, and I am instantly alarmed.
“Honey, Dillon, are you all right?” I ask, concernedly.
Dillon rolls over onto his side, holding his belly. I quickly turn on the light and see that his face is flushed. He looks to be writhing in pain.
“Sweetheart, can you tell me what’s wrong?” I ask.
Dillon just closes his eyes and leans over on his side. He is so young, that I doubt he would be able to describe what is ailing him. Whenever my children get sick, I try to resort to homemade remedies and medicines before taking them to a doctor. I don’t have health insurance, and neither do my children, so we can’t afford to pay hundreds of dollars to see a doctor.
In the light, I can see that his cheeks are very red. I run into the bathroom and retrieve the first aid kit. I get the thermometer and run back into the children’s’ bedroom. I sit down on the edge of Dillon’s bed with the thermometer in hand.
“Sweety, can you just open your mouth? I need to take your temperature.”
Groggily, Dillon opens his mouth and I place the thermometer under his tongue. After a minute, I take the thermometer out. It reads 103. He definitely has a fever.
“You’re going to stay home from school today. Mommy’s going to take care of you. Don’t worry, everything will be all right. You’ll feel better real soon.”
I have no immediate family or friends I can call on to stay home with Dillon. My elder children have to attend school. That leaves me to stay home and care for him. But what that also means is that I have to call into both my jobs and cancel. Perhaps I can pick up additional shifts to make up for the lost money. Right now, however, I am just worried about my son. I hate to take a personal day, but as a single mother, I have no other choice.
Cora, my 13-year old, is wise beyond her years. While she is forced to share a bedroom with two younger brothers, wear second-hand clothing to school, and babysit her brothers all the time, she never complains. I have come to see Cora almost more like a friend than my daughter because she is so helpful around the house. While we certainly don’t live an easy life, I feel blessed with such wonderful children.
I see Cora from across the room yawning as she rises from her bed.
“Mom, why are you still home?” She asks in a sleepy voice.
“Your little brother is sick.” I say. “I’m not leaving him alone, he has a temperature over 100.”
“Do you need me to do anything?” Cora asks.
“I was planning on picking up groceries tonight after work.” I say. “But now, I can’t. So, I need you to run to the grocery store after school and pick up some stuff for the week.”
“How much do we have to spend this week?” Cora asks.
I make a quick mental calculation in my head. Between my two jobs, I usually take in about $1,000 per month. After all bills are paid, we are usually left with around $150-$200 to spend on groceries. Missing one day of work, therefore, places a huge dent in our food money.
“You’ll need to be very frugal at the grocery store this time.” I explain delicately to Cora. “Buy only what we absolutely need and whatever can last longest. Whatever you buy today will need to last us the next two weeks. There’s $50 in my purse.”
“What can I get for $50 at the grocery for a family of four that lasts two weeks?” Cora asks. “Are we that tight on money this month?”
“Yes, I’m afraid so.” I explain. “Remember, earlier this month I had to miss a few days of work because the bus line shut down. I’m afraid that we’ll just have to make the best with the little we have.”
“I suppose I can get lots of pasta and beans.” Cora says. “That stuff is pretty reasonable.”
“I know you’ll figure it out.” I say. “You’re such a smart girl.”
I kiss Cora on the forehead. I see my middle child roll out of bed. Their school bus will be here in a few minutes. I walk them to the kitchen. I hand them their lunches.
“You know how to get to the grocery store, right?” I ask Cora.
“Yes.” Cora answers. “I get off the bus 3 stops before here. I know my way from there.”
I embrace both my children and give them big hugs.
“I love you both.” I say. “Have a good day.”
Outside our small window, I see the big yellow school bus arrive. I wave and watch the children walk outside and get onto the bus. When they are gone, I go back into the room to check on Dillon. I feel his forehead again. I retrieve a cold washcloth from the bathroom and place it on him. I see that he has fallen asleep. I don’t want to disturb him; sleep is probably the best thing for him right now.
Since I am home, I take the time to get chores done around the house. Our house lacks any of the modern amenities of most homes, so it takes much longer to do simple household tasks. We can’t afford a washer and dryer, and taking laundry to the Laundromat for 4 people is too expensive, so I have to hand-wash all of our laundry.
The laundry is like a bottomless pit that is never empty. With three children and two young boys, it seems like clothing is always dirty. I carry the heavy hamper into the kitchen and fill the sink with water. I then begin to hand-wash each article of clothing. It is a long, tedious task that takes hours to complete. When I am finally finished washing the clothing, I carry the much heavier laundry basket outside and hang the clothes to dry on the clothesline. In the summer, the clothes dry in a few hours. But in winter, it takes much longer for the clothes to dry. I have been trying to save up to purchase a washer and dryer, but can never manage to scrape together enough money. Every time I get somewhat close to saving enough, something else in the house goes wrong that is more important than buying a washer and dryer.
Just a few months ago, our water heater broke. It cost thousands of dollars to buy a replacement. I was planning on saving that money to start a college fund for my children, but life had other plans. Because I make so little, it is very difficult to save any money. Almost my entire paycheck goes towards necessities.
Doing laundry is an all day task. So, when Cora returns from the grocery store, I know that almost half the day is gone. Cora purchased lots and lots of beans and pasta. We all joke about how sick we are of beans and pasta, but it is cheap and is often all we can afford. I put a pot of water on the stove to boil. When the water is boiling, I call out to the children that dinner is served. This is the 10th night in a row we’ve had pasta for dinner.
