Symphony
Their voices are like bells, ringing out through the air in a clarion call of frantic joy. The air is silken and warm around me, caressing me with gentle tendrils of wind, as soft as a child’s hands. The grass is smooth, velvet, the pure green of an emerald held up to the light, and it smells of fresh mornings, and new growing things. The children play, moving in free strides of careless abandon, their small hands wrapping around the monkey bars, the chains of the swings as they push themselves skyward. The sun is bright, and as warm as the wind, bathing my face in gold-colored light. I breathe deeply, smell the brown smell of sand and dirt, packed down by eager feet. The swing set creaks, adding a cymbal-like, staccato beat to the xylophone of the children’s laughter. The wind picks up, its whistling flute-like in my ears. The symphony of the day continues.
Cacophony
It sounds like the demonic laughter of a damned creature. One voice cuts above the others, menacing it its very pitch and timbre, it runs down my spine like a finger of ice. Chains rattle, like prisoners hoping to shed their bonds, but knowing there is no escape. Around me, the world smells fetid, overly sweet, like things left in the sun to rot. That same sun beats down on me, relentless, stifling, and not lessened by the wind hissing like a serpent in my ear. My mind knows they are children, but when I close my eyes I can only picture a horde of tiny feet, and tiny hands, pursuing me with their grasping attention. Their laughter takes on a new tone, high and shrill. It pierces my ears like a nail, runs along my back teeth like a file. The grass’s very hue hurts my eyes, bright and artificial, like the dye in some synthetic, cavity-inducing drink. The wind increases, not howling, which might at least provide satisfaction, but instead whispering vicious secrets to me. I wait, knowing the darkness will come, and praying it comes soon.
Analysis
In writing these pieces, I created a different impression of an identical scene by varying the way I described the details, and choosing very loaded language to convey my meaning. I did not omit elements, so much as provide connotative meaning to those elements. In fact, I delieberately included the same parts in both pieces, to strongly illustrate how each of those elements can be colored, depending on the word choice around them. It requires attention to detail to include every element, without changing the tone of the piece.
I used strong imagery to generate the meaning of the pieces. I chose a background of music because when described in positive terms it brings forth many positive associations in the reader. Even the term “symphony” implies musical harmony. In the second piece, I again played with the impressions of sound and smell, this time in a highly negative way. Every sound is a physical assault on the body of the speaker. Noise is a “file,” the color of the grass hurts the speaker’s eyes. Perceptions are associated with physical pain, whereas in the first paragraph they are associated with physical pleasure. In addition, I used direct statements as the opening of both paragraphs, setting the tone clearly and emphatically. This allowed me to dictate what the reader would take away A strong statement makes it obvious to the reader what the piece will be like, and what attitudes they are encouraged to derive from it. This clear statement is fraught with imagery, and again, sets the tone of the pice.
I chose words carefully for their impact. In the first piece, word choice is all unreservedly positive, using terms such as “joy,” “warm,” “caressing,” and “bathing.” All possess very positive connotative meanings. In addition, the similes used, and the underlying melodic metaphor are generally associated with happiness and generally uplifting feelings. On the other hand, the word choice in the second piece is strongly negative. Words such as “demonic,” “cuts,” “serpent,” and “shrill” convey volumes of meaning, while still remaining relatively understated. Even the tentatively positive words, such as “laughter” are paired with negative words.
In addition, I showed the reader what was occurring, rather than simply telling them what happened. For example, when the wind increases in one piece it is described as the sound of a flute, providing a solid, sensational image to associate with a detail. In the second piece, the wind whispers secrets. This is much more evocative than the wind simply blowing. I employed metaphor extensively in the piece, describing each sensation in relation to an analogy. In addition, there is limited use of simile, specifically when describing the grass in the second piece.
Reflection
In composing this essay, I was most strongly struck by the fact that the same details can be used in two different ways, to create utterly different impressions depending on the word choice and imagery associated with the given descriptions. I enjoyed using strong underlying themes, including music and hellish imagery. I found it fascinating how one could twist one’s perceptions simply by the way one included different terms. This causes me to think about the way the media spins stories to its consumers. If it is simple to change even physical perception, it must be very simple to alter things as abstract as political opinions and outlooks. I believe, moving forward, I will be very aware of the word choice used in things such as political commentary, and watch out for the feelings generated in me by different terms.
