Abstract
My motor skills developed on time, although my motor coordination is still not very good. My physical development is in line with normal course of development of a person. I have sustained healthy weight throughout my childhood and adolescence, and my height and weight started growing rapidly during puberty that started at the age of 11. My height and weight during puberty were different from my peers, which made me feel self-conscious and lowered my self-esteem. Puberty was also marked with emotional and behavioral changes that affect many adolescents. I have completed Piaget’s stages of development on time and successfully, and I am currently at the formal operations stage developing critical thinking skills and logical reasoning. I had short attention span, which made it more difficult to study. I have also developed good strategic and short-term memory with special exercises in childhood. My processing speed improved over time, and I realized that I could operate my cognition purposefully at the age of 7. I have developed language skills relatively quickly because of being constantly surrounded by adults, who were willing to communicate with me. My parents had authoritative parenting style, which helped me develop secure attachment. The hardest stage of Erikson’s model of development was the Industry vs. Inferiority stage because of the short attention span. I am also currently at the third Kohlberg’s stage of development, trying to elaborate my own moral views and principles instead of following the conventional or parental ones. My current identity status regarding relationships is identity moratorium, but I have established identity in regards to my career. I have also always identified myself as a girl, and my sexuality started developing at the age of 5. My self-esteem lowered during adolescence because of the change in ideals and ideal self, but has been restored later through self-acceptance. My thoughts about death and dying have majorly changed since the death of important people in my life, and I grew more goal-oriented, attentive to my grandparent and appreciative of life in general.
Physical Development
Although I was not very active as a child, according to my mother my motor skills have developed on time, as I learned to stand without support at 10 months and to walk without support at 12 months. According to Shaffer and Kipp (2010), these figures are normal, with 90% of infants mastering these skills at 13.9 and 14.3 months respectively (p. 209). However, my motor coordination developed to a lesser extent, which caused my frequent tripping over many various obstacles and falling when I ran or rode a bicycle till the age of 8. As for my handedness, I was born right-handed, which was first observed by my mother during my sucking my thumb on the right hand. As I grew up, I continued using the right hand in the majority of activities, but I learned that I could be ambidextrous when using a knife. According to Myers (2013), I belong to the right-handed majority, although it is normal for such people to use the left hand in certain activities (p.81).
During my childhood years and until I was about 9 years old, I have sustained gradual increase of height and weight, with my body being proportional and similar to the bodies of my peers. I have never been overweight, but my body mass index has always been closer to the upper margin of the normal weight. This could partly be explained by good nutrition and lack of any serious illnesses that could impact my growth, as well by my inclination towards the less active pastime. Approximately at the age of 9, my body started changing rapidly, with my weight increasing faster than my height, which caused my parents change my nutrition and engage me in various activities, including hiking, in order to help me sustain normal weight. Approximately at that age I started becoming self-conscious and comparing my appearance with the appearance of my peers. Nevertheless, my body image did not stand in the way of my communication with other children until I have entered puberty at the age of 11. Then, I started growing taller, quickly reaching my current 5feet 9 inches by the age of 13 and being one of the tallest girls in my class. This accelerated development is also called “growth spurt” and normally occurs before adolescence, and girls usually experience it at the age of 10.5 years (Shaffer, & Kipp, 2010, p. 217). During adolescence, as a maturing young woman, I became very self-conscious and discontent with my body image, believing that my body was abnormally big and different from my peers’ bodies that have not yet reached their developmental peak. At that time I opted for clothes that would hide any signs of my difference, slouched and tried to behave as if I did not notice that I was an emerging woman. These feelings are very common among adolescent girls, but dissatisfaction with a body in women is also considered a normative part of the modern Western society (Shaffer, & Kipp, 2010, p. 223).Currently, I weigh 180 pounds, and although my body index shows that I am slightly overweight, I feel good about my body and my height-weight proportion and feel very comfortable around my peers because of the developed self-acceptance.
While my puberty began at the age of 11, I reached it, and menarche, at the age of 12, which was considered quite early by the older females in my family. However, according to Shaffer and Kipp (2010), earlier sexual maturation is a trend that started 100 years ago and can be caused by the improved nutrition and medical care that is better at preventing growth-retarding illnesses nowadays (p. 219). At the same time, Myers (2013) suggests that early maturation can be a result of “increased body fat, increased hormone-mimicking chemicals” (p. 192). The primary changes I remember during puberty happened to my body with the emergence of the secondary sex characteristics, including the enlargement of breasts, the growth of body hair, widening of hips and sharpening of face features, including the jaw line and nose. At the same time, I remember changes in my behavior and emotional well-being that manifested through aggression, especially towards my family members, who challenged my striving for independence and autonomy, and swift changes of mood. Although at that time I felt that the whole world was against me, I learned much later that such experience was not unique. In fact, many adolescents are egocentric, developing the imaginary audience, which is the belief that others are focused on a teenager’s looks, thoughts and behavior just as he or she is focused on them, and personal fable, which is the belief that a teenager’s feelings, experiences and thoughts are unique (Nevid, & Rathus, 2013, p. 459). During puberty, these cognitive developments were a part of my social withdrawal, challenging of my principles and beliefs and my rebelliousness, which was a major part of the emergence of my identity that was forming during puberty.
Cognitive Development
I have successfully progressed through all stages of cognitive development identified by Piaget, namely: the sensorimotor stage, the preoperational stage, the stage of concrete operations, and I am currently at the last stage of formal operations (Shaffer, & Kipp, 2010, p. 253). Unfortunately, neither me, nor my mother can clearly remember my progression through the earlier stages. I believe that I have successfully completed the sensorimotor stage as I learned how my various actions triggered responses, including learning that making loud noises would attract attention, especially my parents. I have also learned to coordinate several actions in order to achieve goals, including grab my mother’s fingers in order to be lifted, which is a very simple goal-oriented behavior (Shaffer, & Kipp, 2010, p. 254). At this stage, I have also learned about alternative actions with the same object and whether they achieved my goal of not. At the age of about 2, I learned deferred imitation, which was manifested through the use of mother’s lipstick in an attempt to paint my lips. I have also developed a concept of object permanence, which was demonstrated numerous times when I played hide-and-seek with my parents. During the preoperational stage, I have learned more about how symbols can substitute real objects. In particular, I learned to speak at the age of about 16 months, which is a major milestone of this stage (Shaffer, & Kipp, 2010, p. 261). Another manifestation of my completion of this stage was my love to pretend that I was a little mermaid or a Cinderella when my parents put dresses on me. However, I do not remember when and how I developed the theory of mind. During the completion of the concrete-operational stage, I have learned to think abstractly, developed conservation and relational logic (Shaffer, & Kipp, 2010, p. 272). At this stage, I could already solve easy problems and was less egocentric, but instead interested in other’s thoughts and opinions. I believe that school majorly helped me finish this stage, not only through formal training, but also through constant communication with others, which widened my perspective. Finally, I have developed deducting and inductive reasoning skills during school, as well as learned to make hypotheses, at the formal-operational stage. However, I am still developing critical thinking skills, which is often a lifetime process, since I have many biases and can often resort to, or not notice, logical fallacies.
I always had short attention, and for this reason I experienced troubles sustaining concentration on a single task for a long time, including studying. Short attention spans are normal for a child, but unfortunately educational system often does not take this into account (Shaffer, & Kipp, 2010, p. 311). However, as I grew older, I learned to concentrate for a longer time, partly because of the cognitive development, and partly by getting some kind of reinforcement, sometimes even financial, from parents for good grades and completed homework. As for the memory, although I do not remember if my strategic and short-term memory were good or bad in childhood, my father used to improve my memory through a competitive game, in which each of us tried to remember as many numbers as possible during 30 seconds, 1 minute, 2 minutes and 5 minutes. Nowadays, I have a very good strategic and short-term memory, as it is very easy for me to hold information without manipulating it or using strategies to hold it in my memory, as well as to remember various details using memory strategies. My processing speed has also gradually improved during my transition from childhood to adolescence. At the same time, I believe I developed a certain level of metacognition at the age of 7 during the aforesaid memory exercises with my father. At that time, I started understanding that I could think and remember something deliberately.
My language skills started developing during infancy, with my first words being “mama”, “dada” and some words for food, according to my mother. These first developments, according to Hoff (2003), take place to serve the needs of the child (p. 171). But my first meaningful sentences, although grammatically incorrect, were produced at the age of 16 months. I have always been surrounded by many relatives and parents’ friends, which helped me to develop language skills faster, because, according to Hoff (2003), “the language is learned in the context of interaction with others, in routines such as feeding and dressing and, in some cultures, interactive games, book reading and more” (p. 182). I have learned grammar gradually through trial and error and have successfully developed language skills through communication, reading, as well as learning foreign languages at school, and by the time I hit puberty, I could already communicate my thoughts clearly using complex structures and solid vocabulary.
Socioemotional Development
Being demanding, but not very strict, as well as cooperative, but not too permissive, my parents used authoritative parenting style (Nevid, & Rathus, 2013, p. 473). They would not tolerate my tantrums, but did not punish me strictly for them, instead trying to talk and find out the reasons behind my behavior. However, in situations when I behaved recklessly during adolescence, they were rigid and demanded that such behavior would never be repeated. However, their kindness and ability to communicate with patience, respect and understanding reinforced my respect for them and my healthy attachment to them. My attachment to parents was secure, which was manifested through my openness to exploration and communication with strangers when my mother was around, and my search for her in situations, when I experienced fear. According to Shaffer, & Kipp (2010), such attachment is prevalent among 65% of 12-months-old children in the United States (p. 456).
For me, the hardest stage of Erik Erikson’s model of development was the fourth stage, also known as Industry vs. Inferiority, during which a child usually learns that he can get praised for his work and its results, or can get the feeling of being inadequate among his peers (Erikson, 2014, p. 233). As I said earlier, I had a short attention span, which made it very hard to keep focus on my studies for a long time and made me feel that I could not keep up with the peers. However, my parents successfully used reinforcement to help motivate me to improve my attention and industry. Currently, I am on the sixth stage of development, which is Intimacy vs. Isolation, as I seek meaningful relationships with others, but I believe that I have not resolved my Identity crisis yet and am at the stage of Identity moratorium, still asking questions about important life commitments and my beliefs about them (Shaffer, & Kipp, 2010, p. 505).
At the first Kohlberg stage I learned that I could adapt to different people’s views in order to seem good. However, during the second stage, my morality started repeating the principles of my parents and other significant adults. However, currently I am at the third stage, developing my personal moral views and principles, instead of using the internalized views of important people in my life and the conventional principles prevalent in the society.
My current identity status regarding relationships is identity moratorium, during which I am attempting to find out more about myself and challenging the existing self-concept. I am not sure if I want to have children in the future and whether I should be committing to serious romantic relationships before I establish myself professionally. In terms of career, the identity status is identity achievement, since I have made a commitment and set goals to develop my career in the field of psychology.
I do not remember at what age I started identifying myself as a girl, but my parents say that I knew that I was a girl at an early age. I also do not remember questioning if I would grow to become a woman or men, but always identified with female Barbie dolls and accepted conventional female gender roles. I reached gender consistency by the age of 6, when I realized that I will stay a girl in any situation (Shaffer, & Kipp, 2010, p. 552). My sexuality started developing at the age of 5, as I remember flirting with a boy-next-door, who was just a year older. I also remember falling in love with a boy at the age of 8 and trying to establish friendship with him simply because of physical attraction to him. However, the realization of my sexuality happened during puberty, as I discovered sexual attraction, started dreaming of my first kiss and agreed to play spin-the-bottle for the first time.
In addition to identifying myself as a young and smart girl, I have developed high self-esteem, partly because of my parents constantly praising me. My self-concept changed as I adopted new roles and entered puberty. At that time, my self-esteem has deteriorated, which could be because of the difference between the real me and ideal self (Nevid, & Rathus, 2013, p.213). This could be explained by my growing fascination with pop-stars and celebrities, and my reading magazines for girls, which changed my ideals, especially given the pubertal focus on appearance. However, I have restored self-esteem by learning to accept myself.
The thoughts about death and dying have changed since adolescence, when they sometimes seemed appealing and did not scare me. At that time, I believed that death was far away, and I had plenty of time. However, since some people, who were important to me, passed away, my perspective on the time has changed, and I learned to appreciate life more. I have also become more concentrated on my goals that I want to achieve before growing very old, and started spending much more time communicating with my grandparents because of the understanding that they may be gone sooner than I expect.
References
Erikson, E. (2014). Childhood and society. New York: Random House.
Hoff E. (2003). Language Development in Childhood. In I.B. Weiner (Ed.), Handbook of psychology (Vol. 6th) (pp. 171-193). Hoboken, NJ: John Wiley & Sons.
Myers, David G. Psychology. 10th ed. New York: Worth, 2013. Print.
Nevid, J. S., & Rathus, S. A. (2013). Psychology and the challenges of life: Adjustment and growth (12th ed.). Hoboken, NJ: John Wiley & Sons.
Shaffer, D. R., & Kipp, K. (2010). Developmental psychology: Childhood & adolescence (8th ed.). Belmont, CA: Wadsworth.
