For most people, it is difficult to believe that a woman would rape a man. Contrary to most people’s beliefs most men fall victim to incidences of rape by women. Rape occurs when is made to engage in sexual activity unwillingly or without consent (Masho and Anderson 99). A man can fall victim to rape if he is; impaired by alcohol or drugs, physically limited or handicapped, below the age of consent which in most states is between 16 to 18 years of age and coerced or physically forced by a woman. According to the Bureau of Justice Statistics 37% of rape incidences were against men and a recent analysis by the Bureau revealed that 47% of such incidences were perpetrated by women (Masho and Alvanzo 239). A survey by the Centre for Disease Control revealed that 1 in 20 men are unwillingly “made to penetrate.” Surprisingly when “made to penetrate” was officially made to part of the definition of sexual abuse frequency of sexual violence between both sexes increased – 1.272 million women and 1.268 million males in a study conducted in 2010 (Luce, Schrager, and Gilchrist 149). Despite having such realizations of the increasing number of men being raped, most people rarely ask why women do it. What is their motivation behind it all? Is it driven by similar reasons as that of males? This paper will try to provide answers to these questions by going into the depths of why women rape with sexual abuse.
Cindy Johnson who has been studying male victims since 1985 reveals that there is widespread sexual assault and coercion by women against men particularly in colleges and also elsewhere (Coxell and King 385). However, such cases have not entered public discussion. She adds that it is contrary to stereotypes concerning female behavior. The general public is of the idea that it cannot happen, that they cannot seem to put it together.
Some people argue that males cannot be raped providing a myriad of reasons. Most these reasons are actual myths that do not hold any ground. One of them is the fact that males are not vulnerable. According to masculine gender socialization, males cannot be raped neither are they vulnerable (Wallace, Roberson 56). It is widely considered unmanly and shameful if a male child cries as he is considered strong, and with the congenital ability to be able to protect himself from harm. People are elusive of the fact that the perpetrator is usually stronger than the weak and vulnerable young boy, and they can use anything to abuse the male child including bribes (Bullock and Beckson 198). The adult male may at times be fearful and helpless to fight back.
The other belief regarding men being raped by women is about sexual belief. Henry Leak of the Survivor organization outlined that female raping has less to do with sexuality and more to do with power and it’s not only found in the homosexual domain (Turchik and Edwards 224). Research conducted by Judith Becker revealed that most sexual perpetrators may have might have gone through personal experiences of sexual abuse, and the majority are most likely to turn out to be adolescent perpetrators. This applies to both male and females.
Another myth that has perpetuated the increase in the incidences of women rape is that males are less traumatized. Some people claim that males are less likely to experience any negative effects from such acts of sexual abuse by women (Turchik and Edwards 212). Recent studies have revealed that the damage experienced from such incidences are experienced equally to both male and female, and even worse for males due to the disbelief of the victimization and social stigma (Wallace, Roberson 98). Frazer, who studied 1280 females, and 84 male rape victims found that hostility and depression were more distinct in male victims than female victims just after being raped. Dr. Eogan noted that male rape victims more intense anger than their female counterparts, but in both the experience was similarly distressful.
Contrary to common belief, males do not always want sex. Willy Van Berlo indicated in an article that erections can be brought about by stress or even slight genital stimulation even in the absence of sexual stimulation (Turchik and Edwards 218). An erection does not equate to consent to sex by the man. Erections can be experienced even in painful and traumatic sexual situations (Giuliano and Rampin 197) The male erectile response just like the one experienced by females is involuntary, meaning that there is no need for arousal for the man’s penis to erect but rather all that is needed is mechanical stimulation. It is worth noting that stimulation and arousal are two different things. Men can experience physical stimulation in the absence of an arousal hence causing an erection. Most men, especially the elderly and those in authority can be intimated and scared into an erection.
There are an array of reasons why women might want to engage in rape. Each incidence is different from the other, and the motivation behind it may turn out to be totally different. However, in all cases, the act of rape by the woman acts as a way of satisfying a specific psychological need.
Some women rape as a way of revenging the wrong done to them by the male victim. She may do this to the man who resembles the one who had wronged or just any other man. Let’s suppose that a woman was physically or emotionally traumatized by either being sexually or physically abused. In such a case, they might feel the need to do likewise to their assaulter or someone who resembles him or her. Contrary to most people belief such an incidence may impose serious mental and physical injuries to the man or the boy. The physical injuries come about when the woman threatens the man with a weapon such as a knife or handgun and may include headaches, nausea, colitis, broken bones, and abrasions on the throat (Garrity 45). A study conducted in 2004 by Stermac and colleagues revealed that the male survivors that accessed sexual assault centers had lacerations (21%) and soft tissue injury (26%) (White 300). Some of the psychological effects that the male victims developed after being sexually assaulted include confusion, problems with intimacy, suicidal ideations, and increased pressure to prove his manhood both sexually and physically (Sable et al. 161). Some women try to seek revenge for being molested when they were young and helpless. They try to get rid of their pain by inflicting pain on males by raping them now that they are all grown up and in control.
Expression of power is another driving force for women to rape their male counterparts. The media indirectly depicts male dominance, particularly on women. These advertised belief involving demeaning of women, provoke some women to seek compensation for domination. The compensation may come in a different way one of them includes raping men. To ascertain their power in the society, they would want to prove their womanhood by belittling men sexually. The consequences of this are devastating as the man is left with the pressure of wanting to prove his manhood both sexually and physically by getting stronger and taking part in violent and perilous behavior or even having multiple sexual partners (Lane, Gover, and Dahod 184). Other than this, the man may have other psychological effects such as the ones discussed earlier.
The other reason that may cause a woman to rape a man is a way of dealing with rejection. One may ask himself or herself what rejection has to do with rape. A woman may rape a man as a way of making up for the rejection she might felt initially by the opposite sex (Luce, Schrager, and Gilchrist 245). One may wonder why a woman may want to rape a man after being rejected earlier by another man. Subconsciously, the mind believes that people sharing particular similarities tend to be the same person. This forms a solid basis as to why some women go as far as raping young boys.
Compensation also forms a strong basis as to why some women rape men. Some of these women who rape men do not have a commendable social life and are not lucky enough when it comes to matters of dating. Pressure from their peers gets them feeling shameful. As a way of compensating their lack of intimacy, they turn to raping men so as to fill the void in their social life (Wallace, Roberson 95). However, they do not know that by doing so they are not doing much to help the situation. The feeling of intimacy that is experienced is temporary and superficial and as a result, they go on raping one man after another. Such a compensatory mechanism is also shared by is also shared by some men who rape women.
Some women turn into rapists just regain control of their lives. They tend not to be brave and confident enough to regain control of their lives in a socially acceptable manner thus becoming rapists in a bid to overpower a helpless man, hence making her temporarily feel in control (Tewksbury 32). Upon investigations, most of these women tend to have had problems while growing up. Such problems include lack of self-esteem, depression, isolation and many others.
Women perpetrators are let off the hook by the idea that men are always wanting and are sexual oriented. They are of the assumption that they have a willing and ready partner who would love to engage in intercourse with them. However, this is not the case as it denies personality, individuality as well as ones right to choose his sexual situation.
Sexual assault victims particularly males require both psychological and emotional healing. Unfortunately, majority of the male survivors rarely speak out concerning their traumatic experience. A psychotherapist by the name Donovan Elizabeth indicated that it’s so unfortunate for male rape victims since they live in a society that is the idea that rape cannot happen to a man (Barone, Wolgemuth, and Linder 589). Such societal ideations have caused an upsurge in the incidences of men being raped. This trend will continue to persist so long as male victims keep quite. In addition further research needs to done so as to determine what is the actual driving force that gets women to rape men and what measures can be put in place to prevent such occurrences.
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