KC Mothers in Charge is committed to end violence against women in household settings and beyond. In being so committed, KC Mothers in Charge plans a broad range of community engagement activities aimed at making battered women more comfortable in sharing painful, personal stories not in pain but in a more, insightful, determined and forward-looking manner. The following (personal) stories, recounted by battered women of diverse backgrounds, unfolded during a Bus Tour organized by KC Mothers in Charge for more community engagement.
Mom # 1
The state of homelessness defines Mom # 1's personal experience. Shunned by her family and peers (for reasons not stated in her casual conversation), Mom # 1 has had to live on street for prolonged periods exposed to all sorts of risks including severe weather conditions, unwelcome (and often aggressive albeit implicit) attitude of passersby, robbery and, not least rape. The "short stays" in houses of friends have proven increasingly unwelcome and hence more social stigma and alienation. The experience has shown, if anything, how vulnerable she is, particularly in absence of actual support and safety system.
The initiative of Operation Breakthrough has been, however, nothing short of a personal breakthrough. By offering real shelter, child care and, not least, proper support, Mom # 1 has been able to "let go" of personal cares, at least for a while. Indeed, Operation Breakthrough appears to have made Mom # 1 much happier as she shifted her conversation into future back from what appeared to be now past cares.
Mom # 2
One can see drug abuse in Mom # 2's eyes. If anything, she has lived drug abuse experience in full. Born into drug abusing parents, raised into smoking marijuana adolescence and, not least, becoming a girlfriend of a drug dealer (later killed in a commit suicide), Mom # 2 has gone a long way to leave a long history of drug abuse behind. Notwithstanding her later "victories" of getting her GED and landing a steady job, Mom # 2's whole life experience – so far – appeared to be mediated by her drug abuse history. There were moments, one believes, when she shared inner fears of relapsing, of being derailed (again) and of being always identified as a drug abuser however and whatever she did.
Mom # 3
This is almost a replica of Mom # 2 in her early drug abuse history. However, Mom # 3 appeared to have better prospects as she has been able to get her GED, attend college and land a local job in KC.
Mom # 4
This is what one would call a babbling, whining and hectic mom. In her conversation, she mentioned a whole lot of persons, places and events. Yet, in all commuting appears to be a constant headache for her. In order to look after her kids, she said, she has to commute on KCMO ***** bus system, wake up at 5 am and get home, often, at 7 pm – every day. Her kids, often accompanying her on her daily journeys, are exposed to every piece of ***** (e.g. robbery or assault) a kid should not be exposed to. Plus, being a piece of ***** *****, KCMO passes are not uniform across all services. She concluded, one believes, by saying many jobs are out of reach because of lack of proper transportation or not having a car. Indeed, commuting (physical and metaphorical) defines Mom # 4.
Mom # 5
This is a woman hero who helped start KC Mothers in Charge after her son's murder in his apartment. First plighted by his loss but later disillusioned by a lack of proper, if any, support system between police and community, Mom # 5 showed her actual mettle by winning a support of a high ranking officer who helped her support local communities in homicide cases. One notable experience stands out by end of Bus Tour. Mom # 5 presented an afflicted mom who saw her own son dying in her own hands after being shot on street. The graphic details brought up by Mom # 5's "showcased" mom only highlighted a structured violence she was subject to – and continues to be.
Overall, all women share a lack of proper support and safety nets in order not only to help stop but to preempt violence. Indeed, all women appear to be subject to a form of structured violence (as is shown in last story), a violence requiring broader intervention beyond immediate "healing" offerings provided to recently afflicted women who are, almost always, left behind again after a while. If anything, police and community should develop more innovative forms of collaboration. Or, if business is resumed as usual, one can only be assured that violence breeds violence.
