Sexuality is a vast topic which covers many different subtopics. Generally, society is becoming more accepting of conversations in most realms of sexuality. However, there are still topics which are deemed unacceptable and inappropriate to bring up in polite company. Overall, open discussion of sexuality serves to make people feel more comfortable with issues that are affecting them and, therefore, conversations of this nature will hopefully become more acceptable as time goes on.
Nowadays, most of society is comfortable talking about sexuality in terms of whether a person is heterosexual, homosexual, bisexual or transgender. This is a relatively recent phenomena, and still not everyone is comfortable speaking about it. However, especially since same sex marriage has become legal in many places around the world, society as a whole is learning to accept it.
Interestingly, the sexual orientation of individuals is sometimes not appropriate to bring up in conversation. However, the reason for this is political correctness. In other words, it is so acceptable for a person to be gay, for example, that other people shouldn’t really point it out or gossip about it. Rather like ethnic minorities, it is often deemed politically incorrect to point out someone’s sexual orientation, unless it is directly relevant to the conversation. This is an important issue as it demonstrates that not only has society become comfortable with conversations about sexual orientation, it has become so normal that it is now deemed impolite and homophobic to mention someone’s orientation without proper reason.
Of course, not everyone is comfortable with people who are of a sexual orientation other to their own. However, generally, they do not seem uncomfortable with the topic of conversation but, rather, the people themselves who are being discussed.
Being able to speak openly about my sexual orientation and that of others has helped me to establish a healthy sense of sexual orientation and of how common it is to be of a sexuality other than heterosexuality. The level of acceptance of the subject in every day conversation makes various sexual orientations seem as normal as they actually are. In my opinion, people who are coming out as gay, bisexual or transgender are likely to find it much easier now than they would have done twenty years ago, simply because society is so much more accepting of it on a day to day level.
There are, of course, many areas of sexuality that society is not comfortable discussing. Sexual preference, for example, is not a subject that can be brought up in polite company. While sexual orientation is acceptable as a topic of conversation, discussing what individuals like to practice in their sex lives is not deemed polite. However, this is not specific to gay sex. Even the sexual practices of heterosexual people is generally thought of as private and not something to be raised in general discussion. Interestingly, this seems to be a fairly steady rule, as even relatively inoffensive sexual preferences would be deemed inappropriate to talk about, as well as more hard-core, unusual preferences. For example, mentioning that someone likes having their ears licked during sex would, arguably, be just as inappropriate as mentioning that someone likes to indulge in radical bondage. Perhaps it is the private nature of sexual practices that is why they are deemed inappropriate to discuss, rather than the practices themselves.
As with sexual orientation, it is possible that sexual preferences, such as ear licking and bondage, will become more acceptable to discuss in society than they currently are. Similarly, again, I think that people would be less embarrassed about their own preferences and desires if they were able to learn about the range that were held by others. As it stands, conversations of this type are limited to between groups of very close friends, and questionable internet sites. While it is good that many good friends speak about such matters openly, not everyone feels comfortable doing so and, therefore, there are many people who do not get to learn about how normal and common various sexual preferences are. As with sexual orientation, young people in particular can believe themselves to be ‘freaks’ for what they are feeling. If speaking about such matters was more acceptable then it is likely that individuals who are coming to terms with their sexuality would feel less unusual and could be comfortable with who they are. Furthermore, open discussion could serve to separate sexual preferences which are acceptable and healthy from those that are illegal, such as bestiality, for example. There are certain sexual preferences which are not acceptable to pursue and people who have overwhelming desires to do so should seek help.
Some subjects about sexuality are more openly spoken about than others. Sexual orientation, for example, is deemed fairly acceptable now whereas, sexual preferences, for example, are still not. However, open conversation about such matters serves to help people, myself included, more comfortable with who they are and what they are feeling. Hopefully as time goes on, more subjects on sexuality will become appropriate to discuss in society.
