LGBT Children and Youth
According to a Gallup poll conducted in 2012, approximately 3.8% of the adult population of the United States identifies as gay, lesbian, bisexual, or transgender. What percentage of this number applies to children and youth is unknown, but it is safe to assume that at least a larger portion of it is accurate (Newport np). Children who identify as LGBT, or who believe they might be something other than heteronormative, face incredible pressure to conform to the ideal, “traditional,” straight identity. Whereas adults have the freedom to explore alternate identities, be it gender or sexuality based, children, by virtue of their dependence on their parents and families, often lack the freedom to do so. In fact, many children are unwilling to acknowledge that they might be gay, lesbian, bisexual, or transgender because it would cause disruption to the family structure, and either upset, anger, or disappoint their parents. This leads to a great deal of mental distress for the child, which can result in very negative outcomes up to and including suicide. Beyond the familial pressures, children also face social pressures to either be straight or to pretend to be straight. Bullying, both physical and cyberbullying, provides pressure on the child or adolescent to appear to be straight just as much as do their family’s attitudes. The LGBT teen or young person is under tremendous pressure to be straight, or to conform to the heteronormative, gender-conforming ideal, which causes considerable stress on the child, and can result in negative outcomes both medically and socially.
LGBT youth are at a high risk of social isolation from their peers. As has been seen on many occasions, individuals who identify as LGBT, or who simply appear to be LGBT to their peers are the victims of extensive bullying. In 2014, a 12 year old boy, Ronin Shimizu committed suicide following extensive anti-gay bullying directed at him. The child was a cheerleader, which seemed to cause it him to be targeted by the bullies (Staff Reports np). Whether or not he identified as gay was immaterial to the other children who harassed him to the point that he took his own life. While many individuals who are bullied for being gay, lesbian, bisexual, or transgender do indeed identify that way, it is not the case that all do. Regardless, it becomes quite dangerous for children to be perceived as LGBT, because if they are they become the target for their fellow students.
This bullying often goes far beyond the child’s fellow students. As was seen with the Constance McMillen prom situation, frequently adults, including parents and school administrators, take a part in the bullying. In the case of Ms. McMillen, she was forbidden to attend her high school’s prom with her partner, another young woman. When McMillen insisted, the other students and their parents worked together to create an “alternate” prom which was attended by all students save McMillen, her partner, and a handful of other individuals who were not welcome at the “alternate” prom. IN this case, the adults were part of the bullying that was targeted at Ms. McMillen and her partner. Children are frequently told to seek out an adult to tell when they have been bullied, however, in the case of LGBT students, it is often the adults who are taking part in the bullying (ACLU np).
Both because of bullying and other societal pressures, LGBT youth are at a dramatically increased risk of suicide. IT has been reported that as much as one third of self-identified LGBT youth and children have attempted suicide, and that of those attempts, three quarters identified their sexual orientation as a primary factor (Morrison and L’Heureux 40). These numbers identify only the individuals that actively attempted suicide. Individuals who have had suicidal ideations, or engaged in self-injurious behaviors seem to number much higher, with some hypothesizing as many as 80% of LGBT youth have engaged in either ideation or self-injury (Morrison and L’Heureux 40). These risks are substantial, and indicate a very real danger to LGBT individuals who are under the age of 18.
LGBT teens and youth have difficulties in relation to family pressures as well. Many families continue to believe both that a child cannot know whether he or she is LGBT, and that a child cannot commit to such a “lifestyle.” (Ryan 133). They tend to dismiss their LGBT children as going through a “phase” or “experimenting.” This means that at formative periods in a young person’s life, they are consistently told that their identity is both wrong, and impossible. This has a lasting and potent impact on identity development and formation (Ryan 133). Families tend to want to believe their children are “normal” and it is important to reframe the discourse that LGBT youth are normal, simply not straight. However, since many families cannot process this in the current political climate, the LGBT youth in their homes are subject to intense pressures.
Ryan argues that what is necessary to reframe the narrative that families use to understand their LGBT children (Ryan 134). She asserts that families must be met on their own terms. They must be shown that their children are still their children, and that the parents or guardians simply have more information about their children now. She also states that this must be done in the language and value system that the family itself adopts. This means, for example, speaking in terms of health and wellbeing rather than morality. In other words, if a family has a deeply held religious or social belief that homosexuality or transgender identification is wrong, frame the conversation regarding their children in terms of their children’s health and social/physical development (Ryan 335).
There is also the matter of so-called “conversion” therapy, which has been used to victimize a great number of LGBT children. Some argue it is possible to “convert” a lesbian, gay, or transgender individual from their orientation to heterosexuality. It is legal to require one’s child to attend such programs, and children are not protected from the degree to which such programs go if their parents agree to it. It has been shown that conversion therapy is highly ineffective, and highly damaging to the mental wellbeing of the child forced to undergo it. However, because a child is a parent’s responsibility, a parent that believes that being anything other than heterosexual is immoral is within their rights to compel a child to undergo such therapy.
Health and wellness are a very serious concern for LGBT youth, above and beyond the engagement of their families. Ryan et al reported that many LGBT youth report negative health outcomes, and a significantly decreased level of trust in healthcare providers (Ryan et al 207) than compared to their heterosexual peers. This is hypothesized to be due to the fact that LGBT youth are unable to be fully honest with their healthcare providers. This may be due to the fact that the healthcare provider is seen to be in collusion with the individual’s parents, or because the healthcare provider has provided for the individual since they were an infant. In some ways, this corresponds to a young person’s difficulty in asking for contraception from a trusted family healthcare provider. Individuals are afraid either that their parents will be told, or that they will be seen as too young to ask for it. This means that individuals are far less likely to actually report health problems to their primary care physician, especially if that physician has been working with the individual since early childhood.
While given the modern environment of open access information, it is less likely that a child will be raised without knowledge of other LGBT individuals, such as happened in the past, however a child can easily be deprived of relating to other non-straight individuals. By depriving the child of those relationships, he or she can come to believe that he or she is alone in his or her same-sex attractions. This can result in a sense of alienation from the world, in the absence of understanding that the individual has others like him or her. This isolation can result in the previously mentioned self-injury or suicidal ideation, due to the mistaken belief he or she is utterly alone.
While this isolation still does exist, with the advent of the internet, the isolation of LGBT youth is much less than it has been. A large percentage of individuals report using message boards and chat rooms as a means of connecting to others with the same kinds of orientations as the individual possesses. Gender identity becomes much more flexible on the internet, because individuals can choose to present as any gender they desire, which can be incredibly freeing for the individual in question. In fact, internet usage has dramatically increased the visibility of LGBT youth, through access to fora that provide them an outlet to communicate with other individuals and youth that identify in the same manner. Hillier et al argue that the internet can be a dramatically effective safety net for LGBT youth, providing them a sense of community, outreach and relationship to one another (Hillier et al 230).
Beyond providing a sense of community, the internet provides another valuable service to LGBT youth, though one that might not be considered as valuable by the average individual. The internet provides a means to meet romantic partners, across the barriers of distance. It has been argued that this distance-breaching ability of the internet in developing romantic attachments is as vital as the community building aspect (Hillier et al 230). This is due to the fact that, as previously mentioned, many LGBT youth feel incredibly alone in their existence, and as though they will never find a romantic partner. However, by exposing them to increased ability to find a partner, they are able to both confirm their sexual and gender identities in relation to others of their own age, and affirm that not only are they not alone, they are not destined to be lonely.
Beyond the pressures of family and society that are placed on LGBT youth, there are very real medical concerns as well. As discussed above, individuals are far less likely to communicate with their primary care provider if they have been seeing him or her since childhood (Ryan et al, 40), but that is only the beginning of the potential health risks for LGBT youth. For example, most middle and high school sexual education programs do not include sexual health information for LGBT youth. They are focused largely on pregnancy prevention for heterosexual teens, and nearly all information is filtered through the lens of heteronormativity (Ryan 41). This means that LGBT individuals frequently feel isolated, because they are not being given information they can use. More, however, it means they are at significantly higher risk of sexually transmitted infections, because they have not been given appropriate information on how to avoid them. Further, the risks associated with non-heterosexual sexuality are either ignored or dramatically overemphasized. LGBT intercourse is not treated with any degree of normalcy, and thus it is often seen as incredibly deviant. That deviance means that sexually transmitted infections are a logical conclusion. Effective sex education would greatly prevent this.
Coming out is very important to LGBT children, especially in relation to their peers and family. Coming out is the process by which individuals tell other individuals in their lives that they fall on the LGBT spectrum. Coming out can be done in one fell swoop, or in stages, with the individual communicating to portions of his or her social circle slowly. Often, children come out to their friends prior to their families, perhaps because they are generally more comfortable with their friend’s reactions, and with the lack of potential repercussions associated with their families. Either way, the coming out process is important. It is not always done by younger children and teens, but older teens tend to come out to their families and friends. This coming out allows the teen to be much more free with themselves and their identities, and come to be accepted as who they are and not who they are wished to be.
Parents can help support their LGBT children in a variety of ways, none of which are difficult, but all of which require a willingness to work with one’s child. First, the parent must be willing to accept their child for who they are, not who they wish them to be. They must be able to see that their child, in coming out, is simply allowing the parent into another element of their child, not changing who their child is entirely. To this end, parents must be supported in embracing their children, and who their children are. They must be given access to community support groups, and organizations that will aid them in providing their children with the support they need. In some ways, the families of LGBT youth need a degree of support similar to that of their children.
Society also needs to learn to adapt itself to the needs of LGBT youth. With more and more individuals becoming comfortable with coming out at a younger age, LGBT individuals are becoming more and more visible. This means that the needs of that community must be met, and can no longer be ignored. Further, because this population is so high risk, it is actually wise to set aside additional resources to enable the members of it to succeed in their lives despite extensive amounts of prejudice and resistance from the community at large.
LGBT children and youth require a great deal of support from their families, peers, friends, and social groups. They face unique challenges, different from that of their peers, often related to their sexuality, sexual expression, gender, and gender expression. They require the support of those around them to face those challenges, particularly in a world which has less care for them than for others. LGBT teens are at increased risk of suicide, bullying, sexually transmitted infections, and other risk factors, due to their generally less understood and addressed nature, including the lack of reliable healthcare and sexual education. Overall, LGBT teens and children are a high risk population, which require specialized attention and study in order to provide with adequate resources.
Works Cited
“McMillen v. Itawamba County School District.” ACLU. ACLU. 5 Nov. 2010. Web. 8 March 2016
Hillier, Lynne. et al “The Internet As a Safety Net: Findings From a Series of Online Focus Groups With LGB and Non-LGB Young People in the United States.” Journal of LGBT Youth, 2012: 225–246. Periodical
Morrison, Linda L. and Jeff L’Heureux “Suicide and gay/lesbian/bisexual youth: implications for clinician” Journal of Adolescent. 2001: 39-49. Periodical.
“Americans Greatly Overestimate Percent Gay, Lesbian in US.” Gallup.com. Newport, F. 21 May 2015. Web. 8 March 2016.
Ryan, Caitlin. “Generating a revolution in prevention, wellness & care for LGBT children & youth” Temple Political & Civil Rights Law Review, 2014: 331-344. Periodical.
Ryan, Caitlin. et al “Family Acceptance in Adolescence and the Health of LGBT Youth.” Journal of Child and Adolescent Psychiatric Nursing. 2010: 205-213. Periodical
“12-year-old boy on cheerleading squad commits suicide over anti-gay bullying.” Staff LGBTQ Nation. Staff Reports. 5 Dec 2014. Web. 8 March 2016.
