The Difficulty Of Raising Children As A Working Parent. Essay

It is fair to say that having a job dramatically affects the ability to raise children. Jobs are demanding and time-consuming which means being constantly late for things in family life, or forever delaying doing things with the children. As with many things in life, a job is quite time-consuming and requires the individual to put it first and so guilt sets in as the job often takes precedence over family life whilst children grow resentful and just see an absence of the parent in their life. For example, teaching has the strict deadlines of journalism, the demand of banking, and the workload of a lawyer. A job is not for people who want to say ‘no’ to things on a daily basis which, when single, is not a problem but, as a parent, it means an excess of guilt and a few problems with relationships. Having a job will always make parenthood more complicated as the children miss out on sharing crucial moments of their life with their parents.
Working life is demanding. There’s no two ways about it and it affects parenthood in a wide range of ways. Most notably of which are that working parents often miss important and unimportant parts of their children’s life. This could range from missing the first day of school for their child to not being there to read the goodnight story. Missing pivotal childhood events can lead to the children feeling resentful towards their parents because they feel as though they don’t come first. Working can also cause working parents to miss out on parent’s evenings, football tournaments, school concerts, and family things which means that the children feel detached and disconnected from their parents as they cannot share the main areas of their lives with them. Children don’t understand that their parents must work and will think that they love them less. Of course, they love them more than anything but often, many working parents have no choice and have to work in order to survive.
For many households, both parents have to go out to work in order to make ends meet and that can make life even more complicated. For others, one parent can afford to stay home and often it is the parent with the least earning potential. Traditionally, this is the role of the mother but increasingly, modern times see women going out to work to bring home the bacon with the father staying home as a ‘househusband.’ Many argue that it affects the child’s development without their mum around to nurture them properly. However, this in itself provides extra problems for mothers because it boils down to the eternal problem for the modern woman: having to be all things to all people. The effect of mothers being stretched so thin is undoubtedly bound to have an effect on the children who will begin to notice that mummy is too tired to play or mummy is too busy to play arts and crafts, for example. Arguably, this helps to develop a sense of independence in children but counteractively, it also prevents the mother/child bond to fully develop. Although, in the case of the father staying home, it does help to build that bond which, traditionally, has always been the weaker of the two parental links.
Of course, there are times when one has to draw a line under work and prioritise their family. Weekends and school holidays have to be kept as free from work as possible and working parents must plan fun activities and days out for the family to make the most of the time together. These opportunities to spend family time together are precious and only exist for a few years before the children are too grown up to want to spend time with their parents. The school holidays are boring for children otherwise and so it is crucial that they are kept busy and entertained. For children of parents who continue to work during the holidays and weekends, it is a particularly difficult time because the children continue feeling left out and rejected. The school holidays are a prime time for families to spend together and children recognise that and value it. Particularly since they will have spoken to their friends about what they have planned for the holidays and they don’t want to lose face.
For many parents, there is no option but to work in order to support their families because either there is not enough income between partners or because they are single and have to bring in enough money to buy food, pay the bills and rent and so on. Children don’t always realise their parents are working towards their future and that they work because they want the best for them, even if it might just seem like I’m missing out on lots of things. This can lead to resentment and anger in children, particularly as they become older. The main, negative, effects are that working parents are often absent for big events in their lives and also the smaller ones too – the loss of a first tooth, for example. This can mean that children often feel neglected by their working parents who struggle to make the full and proper time for them. Children lack of the maturity and understanding of life to rationalise why their working parents are not around and so it’s a fine line for parents to tread in case resentment in their child grows.