According to the last research that the center for Disease Control carried out in the year 1998, over a million American children suffer through the ramifications of broken marriages every year. In this battle between the husband and a wife, the party that is victimized the most are the children. Even amongst these children, the trauma hits each and every one of them at different intensity. Some are affected quite severely by the catastrophe while others don’t seem to take note of these changes with as much deliberation. These arguments are a warning that it is hard to predict how much a divorce can implicate the life of an offspring and the only way of making sure comes when these children are put through a messy marriage and who are made to witness its end.
When moving towards a splitting up of a single family unit, the destruction could strike in many different ways. We are going to discuss a few of those implications in the paper focusing particularly on the impact that a divorce can have on the lives of the young ones. The first and foremost trouble in a broken marriage is the weakening of the relationship between the parent and the child. Children who come from divorced families often find themselves getting less support from home when compared to children who come from intact families, even if the families in some cases are functioning, unlike an ideal family. So while the parents struggle to deal with the conflicts that they have as spouses, they also have to get used to the idea of being divorced parents where there is constant sharing of the children and the same children are also moved between homes. Somewhere in the entire tedious exercise, children stop getting the same love and support that they are used to getting from two parents who together share the responsibility of those children and as a result, the relationships that bind the parent and offspring together become strained.
Apart from the apparent penalties of broken marriages, there are also a few others that do not always become evident immediately following a break-up. These are the emotional consequences that the children are put through after a divorce is over and done with. In this department, the boys react differently to a divorce than the girls do. The girls in such situations feel the need for love and often harbor in the hearts the fear of abandonment. These young women feel considerable anxiety when there have to make important decisions typically those that impinge upon their married lives. The impacts in the lives of the young men are different though. Since boys often lack role models outside of a family unit, those who come from divorced families live through less masculine identification and more feminine identification.
Apart from these major changes that the children face in the event of a divorce, there are also many others. The divorce changes the ability of these children to maintain interpersonal relationships; it implicates their social skills and also changes their psychological behaviors and attitudes. There are also increased behavioral problems that can be attributed to the non-existence of a healthy family unit. Children who come from broken families are seen getting into conflict more often with their peers and friends and they can also sometimes act in aggression and cause disturbances at schools and out in the community. These children are also at greater risk of being involved in risky behavior inclusive of drinking and criminal activities.
Divorce can affect children of different ages in different ways. The very young children battle with fears of different nature in this situation, while those who are relatively grown up battle with different concerns. Very young children 3-5 years of age to be more specific hold fear of separation from their parents. They are unsure about which one would take care of them and they also fear for both the parents to abandon them. With children who are a little older, they may withdraw from making developments in the newly discovered world which is the school. Those between 9 and 10 years of age act out to focus attention on themselves rather than letting the spotlight shine on the troubled marriage. Young adults on the other hands suffer from more profound psychological concerns and react by drawing out in their social pursuits and becoming involved in risky behavior.
Bottom line, divorce is an event that can very well shake the foundations of the ground that our children have without considerable efforts learnt to stand steady on. This is an event which forces them to change the way in which they interpret the world around them. This is why this is a step which if even taken should be taken in the most steady and reassuring manner so that the lives of the children can be kept as consistent as can be possible.
Works Cited
Churchill, Patrick F. Fagan, and Aaron. The Effects of Divorce on Children. 11 January 2012. <http://www.frc.org/EF/EF12A22.pdf.>.
Levin, Loius R. HOW DOES DIVORCE EFFECT CHILDREN AT DIFFERENT AGES? n.d. 11 January 2016 <http://www.louislevinphd.com/html/how_does_divorce_effect_childr.html>.
