The Power Of Non-Verbal Communication Essay Example

Communication is an important tool to let people know about one’s thoughts and feelings. It is what helps connect people to one another regardless if the result of the interaction is positive or negative. However, people have a misconception that connecting with others is limited to verbal forms of communication only. The truth is, we make decisions and assumptions according to what we hear, as most of the time, we ignore non-verbal messages we receive and observe from others. The ability to understand and interpret non-verbal reactions through voice tone, facial expressions, and body language, among others, is an essential communication tool when developing relationships with others. This is because a lot of times, either we misinterpret the message of others or the other way around. Non-verbal communication is all about facial expressions, eye positions, gestures, body stance during the communication exchange, and voice tone. We communicate this way either consciously or unconsciously that is why it is important to learn how to discern the meanings of another individual’s responses. Thus, to ensure healthy and positive relationships, we must learn to use oculesics, paralanguage, and haptics appropriately regardless of the kind of relationship we maintain with other people.
Oculesics refer to communication through eye contact, which means words may not be necessary when conveying messages as the eyes can already speak volumes about the message. For instance, when in the presence of a grieving friend, it is sometimes better to remain silent than to offer words of sympathy or wisdom as the movement of the eyes is more than enough to express how one really feels. Therefore, if I want to show a friend compassion and understanding of what he or she is going through, my eyes could show the feelings through intense gaze. Another example is when I try to hide my anger with a smile. Even as I smile, my eyes betray me because the happy feeling does not reach the eyes, thus, people know how I actually feel even if I tell them that everything is okay.
The next important non-verbal communication method is through paralanguage, which is about the intonation, pitch, and tone, among others, of the voice. When an individual is angry, the tone of the voice changes to an icy and steely tone. On the other hand, when an individual is happy, one can hear a happy lilt on the way an individual talks. The same thing is true when I am angry. I have a tendency to talk in high pitch when I am mad or not telling the truth. This is also a good gauge in determining the true feelings of another person because a slow, controlled manner of speaking could mean the individual is seething with anger, but is just hesitant to show his or her real feelings. It could also connote self-assuredness or self-confidence because people who are sure of themselves are very much relaxed when talking.
Finally, another form of non-verbal communication is called haptics, which is about the sense of touch. For example, to show empathy to a friend, I lay a hand on or squeeze a friend’s shoulders. At other times, I place my arm around another individual’s shoulders because it is my way of saying, “I am comfortable with you”, without the benefit of speech. When I wanted to show my brother how proud I was with his accomplishment in sports, all I did was pat his back and he understood that it was my way of expressing pride towards his accomplishments.
As it is, there are various ways to communicate without the benefit of the spoken language. However, regardless of these manifestations of non-verbal cues, it is still possible to experience communication breakdowns when others do not know how to decipher unspoken language. Because of this, huge amounts of important information could be missed along the process. As an example, gender and cultural upbringing may be factors that put a different meaning on another individual’s action and reaction. In Latin American countries, hugging and kissing are normal methods of greeting another individual, even the ones you just met. Thus, a Latin American woman who touches a man’s arms or shoulders could be labeled a flirt if other people do not know her cultural background. In the same manner, a Latin American man who keeps on touching another woman’s arms or shoulders might be misinterpreted as a pervert or someone who does not respect women.
Therefore, to remove these barriers of communication, what I can do is to learn more about non-verbal cues, learn how to decipher the meanings behind responses, and get a better understanding about gender and cultural differences. These are important in order to eliminate misunderstandings among individuals. In addition, when we communicate, we consciously or unconsciously use movements and body language to transmit messages. These minor “nuances” may be picked up by people we are talking to and like us, they will consciously or unconsciously react to our actions.
This activity has further strengthened my understanding and appreciation about the importance of non-verbal communication. While I do recognize that miscommunications are bound to happen when non-verbal cues are ignored, I sometimes have the tendency to forget about them and focus only on what is being said and not on what the speaker leaves out of the conversation. I learned that I should not be focusing only on what I hear, but should be more aware about the unspoken messages that another individual is giving me because sometimes, what the other person is saying is not exactly reflected in the actions he or she is displaying.