Introduction
The story "This Blessed House" was published in 1999. The author of this short story is Jhumpa Lahiri, personality’s difference and marriage is the main theme of this article was discussed in short story. The short story has two main characters, Sanjeev and Tanima who have recently engage. Tanima the bride is also called Twinkle in the short story. The two are Indian couples who have moved to their new house (Lahiri 53). The two newlywed couples find married life very challenging and indeed it becomes difficult for them to cope with it.
Before they got marriage the two characters were dating each other happily and they had thought they are the perfect life match couples for each other. Therefore when the finally got married they both thought they have achieved a milestone in their lives. However in their first few days of their marriage they discovered things are not the way they had thought before. It is then that they noticed that love relationship is different from marriage. How a love relationship is handled is different from the way marriage is handled.
When the couples got marriage as expected they moved to a new house. The house they moved to was not a newly constructed house, it was a vacated house. The people who lived in this house before were Christians, and when they moved from the house they left some Christian knickknacks (Lahiri 58). Hence when the new couples went to fix up and investigate the house, Twinkle found a Jesus Christ porcelain effigy. At first Sanjeew does not like the Christian knickknacks that continue to be spread all over the house but he later found them very interesting. On her part Twinkle does not like them completely and wants her husband to throw away the Christian knickknacks but Sanjeew is reluctant to do so.
What they discovered after they got marriage is that they have totally different live personalities. The difference in their personalities was the main problem in their marriage. This exhibits that people with different live personalities can not cope easily with each other in marriage. The theme of very different personalities is thoroughly analyzed throughout the short story. The difference in their personalities is pointed out when Sanjeew spreads relics all over the house (Lahiri 61). On her part Twinkle was unhappy with the action of Sanjeew of spreading relics all over the house. Hence Twinkle wanted to throw those relics away to annoy her husband. Since Sanjeew did not was to cause a conflict in their marriage he decided to collect the relics that were spread in the house.
However Sanjeew was also pride of himself, thus there is no way he could throw away the relics instead he opted to put the relics on display to her wife. After collecting the relics using a mantle, Sanjeew went and stored the relics on a safer place and every moment they were together with Twinkle he took that opportunity to display the relics to her since she dislikes them. Twinkle as a character is exacting and unadventurous and her personality is totally different to the personality of Sanjeew who does not care much about fine details that are annoying and he is free spirited (Lahiri 69).
The main cause of conflict in their marriage is the difference in their personalities. Hence their different personalities make their marriage difficult and make their stay in “this blessed house” very difficult. According to the author it is Sanjeew who makes their marriage to be difficult, “Of Sanjeev and Twinkle, Sanjeev is the one with the personality that craves order”.
The short story "This Blessed House" is just a reflection of problems affecting marriages. Many marriages in our society are affected by the difference in the personalities of the couple. Couples whose behaviors and characters do not match often find the going in the marriage very tough. For instance Sanjeew was a drunkard and wanted to change the personality of her wife by influencing her to join him in the bar for a few drinks however hew wife respect the Hindu culture which prohibits women from drinking alcohol. The problem of Sanjeew is that he wants her wife to do exactly what he does (Lahiri 65).
However what he forgets is that every individual has his or her own personality and it is extremely hard to change the personality of a person. It is better to live with different personalities than to try and change the personality of an individual which is very hard. Trying to change the personality of a person can fuel a conflict in marriage as it has been the case of the two Indian couples, Sanjeew and Twinkle. This is because every individual did his or her own things in the marriage without cooperating. Yet marriage is supposed to experience maximum cooperation from the two partners (Noelle 23).
Apart from trying to influence a person to change his or her personality it is also very hard to force a couple to do what he or she does not like. Couples should live by mutual understanding of each other and they should respect each other opinion and decision. However once couples starts disrespecting the stance of their partners in life it becomes increasingly difficult for them to continue with marriage. From the short story we find that Sanjeew wants to dance a Tango dance with her wife at the bar against her will. This is very crucial since it can cause break ups in marriage especially to couples who are no tolerant to such behaviors. Likely for Sanjeew, her wife Twinkle was tolerant to such behaviors not because she liked but for the sake of their marriage (Argiropoulos 46).
Many couples in the society especially women always tolerate certain behaviors in marriage not because they are like them, but for the sake of their marriage and children. Undesired actions humiliate the affected partners, in the case of the short story Twinkle is affected by the actions of her husband, but they remain tolerant in order not to expose their problems to the whole society.
Tolerance is part and parcel of marriage and without tolerating each other the couples will end up divorcing. And divorce is not the best alternative of resolving a marriage problem because the children will be the main culprits. Children will suffer most from a divorce since they will lack parental up bring of one of their parents. Thus if Twinkle was not tolerant their marriage would have long end up to a divorce. Many other couples have to tolerate with their spouses in order for their marriage to work well and move on to the next level.
Agreeing on each others opinion or stance is also very vital in marriage. Dictating what should be done in marriage will cause more problems. Hence couples should come to a common stance that incorporates ideas of both partners. During decision making process in a marriage, both husbands and wife should agree on what should be done in a marriage. On the short story, "This Blessed House" Sanjeew and Twinkle argued on where the statue of the Virgin Mary should be placed. Sanjeew wanted to dumb the statue while her wife, Twinkle wanted the statue to remain in the front lawn.
The move by Sanjeew to dictate where the statue will be placed angered Twinkle who felt her opinion is not taken seriously by her husband. As a way of expressing her anger she cried and this soften the heart of her husband who agree to change his uncompromising stance. Both the couples sat down to resolve the problem by agreeing to place the statue of Virgin Mary at a compromise place (Ketu 5). They agreed to place the statue at a place that passersby will not see it. This is because once the passersby see the statue at their place they will view the couples as insane. Since the couple were Hindus they were not expected by the society to keep things of another religion on display.
However the most captivating move by the couples was the way they resolved the problem. Even though at the beginning both were reluctant to resolve the issue on where the statue of Virgin Mary should be placed they later sat down and made a common stance that resolved the stalemate. Couples should formulate various ways of resolving their problems in marriage. Without couples formulating strategies of resolving problems marriages could end up to divorces (Laura 65). Hence it is extremely important for couples to formulate various ways of resolving their problems to enhance continuity of the marriage.
When each couple becomes rigid in decision making all marriages would not survive. Since all couples will leave their spouses for pasture new. However once every partner is flexible and able to accommodate each other ideology then their nothing that can shake the marriage. With proper mechanisms of solving conflicts in place a marriage is likely to sustain any wave that may come its way.
At the end of the short story, Jhumpa Lahiri the author analyzes how the visitors of the couples were amazed with the Christian knickknacks in the house. “Twinkle takes them on a tour of the house, and she tells Sanjeev that they all loved the poster of Christ in the study”. Sanjeew was amused by move of her wife to display the Christian posters. however deep in her heart she knew her husband dislike them and once the visitors’ leaves he will take the posters away. “Twinkle will keep the bust of Christ on the center of the mantel along with all the other items he dislikes” (Laura 45). However the way Sanjeew reacted when the visitors were around surprised her wife who thought he would have overreacted or refused the visitors to be showed the posters.
The way Sanjeew reacted when the visitors were around covered their problems since the visitors found them living happy. Therefore couples should not expose their problems to the society despite how much they are suffering. If Sanjeew and Twinkle exposed their difference to the visitors it would have expressed a bad image to the visitors. Visitors cannot resolve the problems of couples hence couples should try their best to resolver their problems at their own.
In conclusion people with different personalities are a perfect march for each other. However once they are in a marriage they should try their level best to maintain the marriage by becoming tolerant to each other.
Work cited
Jhumpa Lahiri, "This Blessed House", from Interpreter of Maladies, 1999
Noelle Brada-Williams, "Reading Jhumpa Lahiri's Interpreter of Maladies as a Short Story Cycle," MELUS, Vol. 29, 2004
Argiropoulos, Catherine, and Indhu Rajagopal, "Women in Poverty: Canada and India." Economic and Political Weekly 38.7 (2003): 612-14. Print.
Laura Anh Williams, "Foodways and Subjectivity in Jhumpa Lahiri's Interpreter of Maladies," MELUS, Saturday, December 22, 2007.
Jhumpa Lahiri, "Cooking Lessons: The Long Way Home." The New Yorker 6 Sept. 2004: 83-84.
Ketu H. Katrak, Analysis of Conflict in Jhumpa Lahiri’s “This Blessed House”, February 2002, 5-6
Jhumpa Lahiri, This Blessed House, 1999 http://www.encyclopedia.com/article-1G2-3424100021/blessed-house.html
